Posted in Inner Child, Shadow Self, Spirituality

A visit from my inner child

Picture: Google

At the beginning of the year, I wrote a long post, kind of a mission statement I could apply for the year ahead, a promise to myself. In it I asked all versions of myself, my soul, my higher self, my shadow self and my inner child to come forward, and together work as one. To shed separate agendas and you feel equally valued and important. To feel equally loved and acknowledged, and to support me in working for one mission and one goal.

You may have heard me talk about the inner child before and here is an excerpt from the prominent psycho spiritual counselor and mentor, Mateo Sol.

“Inner child work is the process of contacting, understanding, embracing and healing your inner child. Your inner child represents your first original self that entered into this world; it contains your capacity to experience wonder, joy, innocence, sensitivity and playfulness.”

Reconnecting with your inner child allows you to access the fragmented parts of yourself so that you can discover the root of your phobias, fears, insecurities and self worth.

So why should you need to reconnect to your inner child you might wonder. I think the main reason is for healing as trauma is often stored during the early years, during childhood, when we don’t have the necessary tools to process it correctly. Revisiting and reconnecting to your inner child later in life, allows you to process these instances and ultimately set you free.

“When you free the Inner Child – you free the adult also.” -Alcazar

Here are some signs that you may have a wounded inner child:

  • You feel that there is something wrong with you, in the deepest parts of yourself
  • You experience anxiety when going out of your comfort zone
  • You are a people pleaser
  • You don’t have a strong sense of identity
  • You deliberately like being in conflict with people around you
  • You’re a hoarder of things, emotions, people, and you have a hard time letting go
  • You feel inadequate as a man or a woman
  • You constantly criticize yourself for your supposed inadequacy
  • You’re unforgiving to yourself, rigid and a perfectionist
  • You have a hard time committing and trusting
  • You have deep abandonment issues and would cling to relationships, even when they are toxic

If any of this rings a bell, you might ask what the next step is and how you can reconnect with your inner child.

One way you can do this is in the form of writing a letter to your inner child. You can apologize if you feel you’re living a life that doesn’t honor your inner child. Or you could write a simple letter explaining that you wish to build a stronger relationship with your inner child in your life going forward.

And this is exactly what happened as I write that long post mentioned above, encouraging all versions of myself to work together. Feeling equally important and loved. It was my inner child that responded first to my written letter. I was getting ready to take a shower, sitting in front of my vanity, while removing the last traces of make up from the day, when I noticed it (again). When I say again it’s because in hindsight I recalled it happening a few times throughout the day, in specific after finishing that post, but it was then, that evening that it hit me and I truly noticed. Here I was looking in the mirror and my inner child starred back at me. Let me explain: of course it was me, my head, my current face etc. but I had the reddest and rosiest cheeks ever. Everything else was normal, my temperature, everything checked out. I wasn’t running or doing anything that could have brought this on and as a matter of face it seldom happens period and I am not a rosy cheek person.

I do remember it happening in Germany in 2018 while I was there to care for Mom. I was doing inner child work due to the belief of losing a part of my soul during the traumatic death of my Dad when I was ten years old. I underwent a soul retrieval where my ten year old self was integrated and returned to me. I know it sounds intense and it indeed was a very emotional time for me.

Being reunited with my ten year old self that fled my soul in a trauma response to my fathers sudden death, I remember spending time by making my inner child feel as welcome and safe as possible. One night I cooked alphabet soup that I had always loved as a child. I even wrote a post about it titled Alphabet soup back in May 2018

I connected the dots and my sense of truth about my inner child paying me a visit, then, and today was so strong. I just knew and she made herself noticeable with her rosy cheeks.

I had no idea that only a few hours later, my shadow self would come to visit me as well. Perhaps to join the pact and all versions of myself, to get onboard my mission working towards a common goal, but that’s another story, for another time. Stay tuned. 😉

Posted in Life, Manifesting, Spirituality

Read this message if it appears to you

Read this message if it appears to you.

This was the title of a message from S G Ruddy. Being a firm believer that the universe throws bits and pieces our way, I often feel that these pieces are words we need to hear to either be reassured, that it is a confirmation that we are on the right path, or a motivation to keep going. So this was no different, and just like being told, I read the message as if it was written for me. I hope you can feel the same because I want to share it with you, and you too need to hear it. So here we go…

This message is appearing to you today for a greater reason and purpose. It is simply a reminder from your guardian angels and your spirit guides. They want to remind you that no matter what you may face, they will continue to stay by your side. They will be supporting, encouraging, guiding and uplifting you every single step of the way. As you’re reading this message they are each stepping forward to wrap you up in a blanket of unconditional love, peace, protection, strength amen healing. They want you to move forward now with an understanding and an awareness of just how special, supported and loved you are.

As the portal to a new world is opening next month, take comfort in knowing that you are ready. You have prepared for this for such a long time and your rebirth is nearly complete. Everything is as it should be. Rest. Be assured. You are loved and protected.

Posted in Inspiration, Mother nature, Spirituality


It’s new word Monday again, and although this picture dates a couple years back, this was definitely one of those moments.

Today’s word is Ataraxia, a Greek noun that stands for the state of blissful and serene calmness.

Can you imagine yourself sitting on top of this rock, with this views, caught in a moment of bliss, serenity and nothing but calm? Soaking up the warmth’s of the sun, in a t-shirt while gazing at the snow covered peaks across from you? It’s a magical place for me and I think this word is perfect in describing it. I hope you, yourself know of a place similar to this that brings you immense joy and a calm that is restorative and healing. 🙏🏼💙

Posted in Inspiration, Mother nature, Spirituality

Hello November

Fall is such a fast moving season and in the blink of an eye, or a good storm, it’s over and gone. This picture was taken last month during a hike in the beautiful Sierra.

We are in the homestretch of 2020. The 11th month has started in a 12 month cycle, another month filled with opportunities as well as challenges. Many are looking forward to 2021 as if a miracle is going to unfold as soon as this year is coming to an end. I fear that many will be disappointed as we close the book that is 2020 and start 2021 with more of the same old. And yet it’s not the same. January 1st will not miraculously leave behind all the struggles we had and much will cross over into the new year, with continued and new challenges. As we hope that life will somewhat normalize again in 2021, I can’t help but wonder once more what we’d define as normal these days.

So even if things continue in the new year, maybe we find ourselves in a better position somehow. Whether it is because of slight changes towards a better future, or seeing the challenges as opportunities and a time that has to have it’s place.

I’ve read the other day that many are experiencing intense healing and ascension symptoms. That a huge purge is happening as we prepare for the new world. Random emotional lows and physical symptoms can occur when you least expect them. It can also interfere with your routine and slow you down. It’s a time you are forced to face what you’d rather ignore and pretend that it doesn’t exist. This purge can be likened to the final push a mother gives before her baby enters into the world. Many of us are stuck in the birth canal, hesitant to leave and explore what’s outside.

The pressure to be re birthed is immense and your responsibility to the new world can incite fear. As a warrior of the light, you’re unable to ignore your identity. Your leveling up and paving the way for the new world. Rest, self-care and taking baby steps into the new. Know that all is well and how it is meant to be. You’re doing amazing. Trust 🙏🏼

Posted in Awareness, Spirit animals, Spirituality

In the company of a Crow

Do you believe in spirit animals and their sightings? Have you ever noticed that all of a sudden an animal crosses your path in the most unusual way, out of the ordinary, or over and over again until you finally become aware? For me these moments and animals are messengers, something that tries to get my attention, something I should know about.

A crow has been hanging out with me over the last couple of days. I think I know her and why she is appearing in my life. She travelled quite a ways to be with me, but on the other hand, there really are no distances in the spirit world. Silently she sits in the backyard and there is not a peep coming from her. Walking up and down the fence line, she pauses as we catch glimpses of each other, starring into each other’s eyes. She makes me sad in some ways, reminding me of loss, and yet I find reasons to smile, as she also brings forth comfort and reminders of the good ole times, and a dear soul sister. Crow’s silence tells me that everything has settled down, that there is bliss and enjoyment in the stillness. That the hectic and ruckus has seized and peace is restored once more. That it is ok for our journey to take on individual directions. Whether we travel together or separate, we remain connected and are never alone on this path we call life. I am grateful for her visit and the message she brings. I understand her language, and hear the unspoken words. My intuition is keenly aware and Crow is here to reassure me.

In other messages, she tells me that I am on the verge of manifesting something I’ve been working towards for a while. She reminds me to be watchful over the next couple of days, to notice any clear omens or signs that will guide and teach me. Further I am to expect a big change very soon. She tells me that I’ve noticed something that’s out of balance or an injustice that hasn’t been addressed, and it’s important to speak up about it. She is telling me that I am about to get a glimpse into some future event that affect me directly.

Raven announces that Magic is in the air and something special is about to happen. I am urged to pay attention to my dreams and visions, especially colorful and powerful ones, as these are indicative of prophecy. In any undertaking or any relationship I’m told to be very clear as to what my intentions are, because whatever they are, that’s what will manifest. Raven is here to remind me that I am gradually shape shifting to a more confident, powerful, and spiritually based self that will continue to emerge the more I let go of my old self. Prepare to observe an increasing number of synchronistic events over the next few days, notice them and appreciate them, and don’t try to figure them out.

Posted in Spirituality, Symbolism

Signs from heaven

Many more feathers are finding their way to me. I always get so excited to find them and they have a special meaning for me. I see them as signs from heaven and that my guardian angel (s) are near.

All of these were found in one day and I was happy to see two white ones amongst the bunch. I usually associate those with messages from Mom, while the black ones come from Dad. I am not at all surprised about the feather appearances lately. Much has happened this year on a spiritual and growth level. I have lost loved ones, both physically and in other ways. The end of this month marks Mom’s one year anniversary since she left this earth to become an angel. It’s been a tough month and she has been on my mind a lot, as well as the house she has left behind that stands empty. It all weighs on me and perhaps she knows. I take her white feathers as a sign and comfort to let me know that she is fine on the other side. I just miss you, that’s all.

Posted in Life, Spirituality, Symbolism

Black (reminders) feathers

A beautiful gift fell out of the sky, a black feather. I have collected many over the years and it always makes me smile to find them. It’s amazing how much meaning and joy such a simple gesture brings, I wouldn’t have it any other way.

It’s been many years I started my collection, but this black, wide one, is a new one to add to the collection. All my others are longer and skinnier. Measuring about 6″ in lengths, it’s the fullness and widths, along with it’s blueish shine that makes this one unique. Please let me know if you have any clue which bird this feather might belong to. I thought maybe a Crow.

I found it in central Nevada during an attempt of chasing blue sky. The air quality has been terrible in large areas of the United States with thick smoke engulfing everything within it’s past. Ranging from unhealthy to hazardous, I haven’t seen my mountains for weeks.

Meaning of black feather:

  • You’re being protected by someone you loved and lost
  • You’re not alone
  • A sense of clarity is on its way

Finding this feather has now led me to expanding my collection, which means buying feathers and not just finding them, along with a desire of getting some porcupine quills. Yeah I know, I’m strange 🤪

Posted in Inspiration, Spirituality

The aura of your heart

Did you know that your heart has an aura? An aura is the distinctive atmosphere or quality that seems to surround and be generated by a person, thing, or place. In spiritualism and some forms of alternative medicine it’s a supposed emanation surrounding the body of a living creature and is regarded as an essential part of the individual. These colors tend to show up during intense periods, and also when we intentionally open our heart space. These shades range from reds, orange, yellow, greens, blues, violets, silver, gold, black, whites, Earth tones, browns and pastels. Each color is said to have a different meaning and I’m not sure if there is a permanent color or if these colors change with your feelings and your experiences. For instance will a negative event change the color of your aura and can it become permanent?

Here is what we know;

Science has shown that our hearts have a measurable magnetic field and an intelligence. This aura or magnetic field can be felt by others’ hearts and brains, and is constantly affecting our environment. It’s often called one’s inner voice. The Heartmath institute has shown that when your heart is coherent, stress is reduced, cognitive function increases and intuitive discernment increases.

Are we living from our heart space or the ego?

Posted in Inspiration, Life, Spirituality

8:8 Lions Gate Portal

It’s that time again and the Lions Gate Portal opens today. It is said that 8:8 is the luckiest day of the year, and I hope whether you are aware of today or not, it truly is so for all of us.

If you haven’t heard of the Lions Gate Portal before, it is when the blazing sun in Leo will link up with the brightest star Sirius, creating a cosmic alignment known as the Lions Gate Portal. Because of the energy of this alignment, August 8th is a supercharged day for manifesting abundance and dreaming big.

August 8th is a sparkling spiritual window of opportunity and although today is the peak for harnessing this auspicious mystical energy, it is believed that the portal is open for several weeks. Being aware can help set your intention and manifest your dreams. Here is what you can expect.

Numerology – 8:8:2020 = 8 8 4 which stands for balance, Harmony, grounding abundance & spirituality with inspired action.

Influx of spiritual light for ascension, higher consciousness & DNA upgrades through the Sirian dimensions

Anchoring the divine into the physical. Allow yourself to align with this potent activation.

And just like this, voila, consider that your day just got brighter and a little bit of luck is within your reach. 🙏🏼. Make a wish and hold that thought.