Posted in Adventure, Animals, Death, Emotions, Experience, Feelings, Hiking, Human spirit, Inspiration, Life, Life lessons, Loss, Mother nature, Motivation,, My story, Pets, Photography, Purpose driven, Self help, Spiritual awakening, Wisdom

The heart of a lion

Nikki came into my life as she was nearly two years old and I feel extremely blessed that I could rescue her from her abusive owners. I didn’t know at the time that she would equally play a huge part in my life, ultimately rescuing me as much as I rescued her. I was unaware that she was coming from a violent home and all I knew about was the apartment situation that would lead to the separation from her prior owners. Soon enough, the same day, her dramatic past began to unravel and I got a glimpse into some of the struggles this poor little baby had endure. From being chained and staked in the backyard, to a prior broken leg from abuse, her fear of water from almost drowning at the hands of her owners, her food aggression and her fear for humans. I won’t go into too many details to relive this horror, which I mostly found out through her behavior or through the jokes of her previous owners. Needless to say it was also the last time that they ever got to see Nikki. I always felt very lucky to have been the one able to turn her little precious life around and give her a reason to live. Besides having the heart of a lion which I will describe later, she also looked like a lion as I first saw her. A good brushing, which was yielding numerous brushes filled of hair later, (it would have made the softest pillow stuffing ever and I wish I would have kept it), she emerged as a different dog and looked nothing like the Chow Chow mix she was suppose to be. She looked like a Shiba Inu mix, a starved one that was reduced to nothing more than skin and bones after shedding the matted fur mess. She was visibly malnourished.

Her eating could hardly be described as eating. She was scarfing her food down in such a hurry, forgetting to chew, obviously being afraid that somebody would take it away. In return it caused her to choke and gasp for air. It was during that time that I considered learning the Heimlich maneuver, just in case. Reaching down to pet her, I was hoping to talk some comforting sense into her, but it only caused her to duck. She was afraid that the hand that was coming down would hit her, which I’m sure had happened too many times. Over the years I made a game out of it to take away her fear and associate the hand with a new meaning. Fun and playtime…”The claw”. It took years to rehabilitate her and years before she took herself not so seriously, finally allowing herself to play. It was then that the Shiba 500 (playful little outbursts of energy, running around like crazy while smiling from ear to ear….and yes I’m still talking about Nikki, she had the biggest smile I ever saw on a dog ) was born. It was an extraordinary day and I remember how happy I was as she dropped her fear and revealed her true nature. Her beautiful soul emerged and for the first time there was no fear in her eyes.

Nikki and I had a special bond, a bond words simply can’t describe. She literally was my fur baby and meant everything to me. She was my child and she lives on within my heart. I didn’t think that I could have loved her any more as I did, and despite that she couldn’t physically communicate with me, I understood everything she was trying to convey. Her gratefulness for saving her was obvious in all of her actions, all you had to do is look at her little face. I have always considered myself an animal lover, but it was Nikki who taught me to see more, to see the living soul mirrored in her eyes. I despised people referring to her as nothing more than an animal, a pet,  I simply couldn’t relate. She was so much more, she was a beautiful living soul, full of spunk and emotions.

After Sparky’s death her little heart was broken and our relationship became even closer. I was all that she had left and while Sparky was alive, I might have not believed that our bond could get any stronger. But it did. Nikki became a hiker at the age of 12 and I once heard that 1 dog year is equivalent to 7 human years. There is much controversy discussing this topic which includes the consideration of various breeds etc, but if there is truth to it, Nikki would have been 84 years old as she took up hiking. A true testament that it is never too late to start doing what you love. At the age of 84 she found a new passion (she probably always had it and I feel guilty of not introducing her to it earlier while coming up with various excuses of not being able to handle two dogs by myself, working so much back then and still now, to etc. etc.) a passion that would help her cope with the loss of her companion and soulmate, Sparky. 

Preparing for a hike was tricky and I had to be careful as the adrenaline and her sheer excitement of going for a hike would often lead to overexertion. In her senior years Nikki had developed arthritis and her own excitement and willpower often exceeded what her little body could handle. It was crazy how she would pick up on the tiniest of clues before a hike. She definitely knew the backpack and me grabbing it would result in the Shiba 500, running around like crazy, wiping out, hitting a slippery patch on the hardwood floor or leaping through the air almost knocking me over were all results if I wasn’t sneaky enough. All things her old little, aged body couldn’t put away so easily anymore. Her leash was no difference or putting on her harness, even the sound of the car could trigger the excitement, followed by what I can only express as that shit grinning, tongue out smile that appeared on her face in anticipation. She didn’t know her own strength and I often felt that it was sheer adrenaline and her willpower, the passion for what she loved and the heart of a lion full of courage that propelled her forward. Looking back, I realize that Nikki was one of my greatest teachers. I have no doubt that without any spoken words, she has taught me more than I ever learned from some who could speak. I might have rescued her from her abusive owners but in the end I’m not so sure of who ended up rescuing who. Let’s just call it even.

It’s been 2 1/2 years since Nikki has been gone and I’m not sure if I will ever get over her loss. I’m reluctant to say that I felt as if I lost a child. Despite two miscarriages I never experienced losing a child that lived with me for several years and I can’t truly compare it to make such a statement. Still it is the closest form that I can describe her loss and my life remains forever changed. People have encouraged me to get another dog and while I believe that a new dog could ease the pain and help me make new memories, I also know that nobody will ever take her place. It is the uncertainty and the changes that lie ahead that have prevented me from taking on the responsibility of getting a dog right now. Nikki will always have a special place in my heart and I held on to her as long as I could. Her wings were ready but it was my soul that wasn’t prepared to let her go for selfish reasons. In the end I had to do what any animal lover would have done to spare her additional pain and a life that had no future. And still, no day goes by that she isn’t on my mind. I wish she was here and the thought of being reunited with Sparky brings me only little comfort. I have to remind myself that her beautiful soul is with me forever, pain free to roam and play once more until we can meet again. In the meantime there is an empty hole within my heart as I have no choice but to roam without her.

Nikki has taught me that it is never too late. To pursue your passion as it is the rhythm of everything that matters in life. Do it with passion or don’t do it at all. If you have to do something you don’t like and the passion is lacking, change your stars and pursue what matters. Work towards your goals and take that first step no matter how tiny it is. Just do it anyways. Nikki has taught me to look beyond and recognize a soul within every living being. To drop its formal name of calling it an animal, but to see the spirit and the soul that lies within. Nikki showed me perseverance by pushing beyond  the pain as nothing in life is free. To be a warrior and realize that the harder the struggle, the sweeter the victory. It takes life shattering incidents to mold us into the people we are meant to be, otherwise we just don’t learn. I believe that it was Nikki who initiated the first stage of what would lead me to my spiritual awakening. The other element of importance was that the timing was right. I simply became aware and was willing to listen and see the signs that have always been there, unnoticed until then.

Coming soon…stage one of spiritual enlightenment and spiritual awakening. I believe now….

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Posted in Buddhism, Emotions, Experience, Feelings, Human spirit, Inspiration, Life, Life lessons, Motivation,, My story, Purpose driven, Self help, Spiritual awakening, Wisdom

The quest for more 


(Focus…)
It was my friend “Pinterest” that peeked my curiosity and was guiding me without being aware of it at the time. I had reached a point where I was questioning everything these days. Old learned principles and my way of life was simply not enough anymore. I was existing but I was not alive. Physically I was breathing, but inside of me my soul was dying a little more with each passing day. The void grew bigger and I couldn’t remember a time where I didn’t feel burdened and bogged down with responsibilities and obligations. Really, it’s been like that for years, who was I kidding. I grew more and more intolerant to it, while growing more and more tolerant to changing my stars. I didn’t know how to do that as I felt trapped in a vicious circle that always had the same outcome. I didn’t understand all the components involved and I didn’t know what was going on, but I was willing to listen in the hopes to attain more insight and understanding. I had noticed physical signs in the form of totem animals and their symbolic meaning. I would soon learn that it was only the beginning and more sightings were heading my way. I also noticed the silent messages and the signs through the quotes I found on Pinterest. I was trying to understand the underlying reasons as to why a particular quote would reach me at a certain time. One could easily dismiss this and think that it is a non brainer to come across quotes if that is what you are looking for. Of course it is on a superficial level but I was on a quest for more, a quest to understand. Understand what?…you might ask, what’s there to understand as it might seem nothing more than a set of mere coincidences. Somehow these weren’t coincidences to me and all the messages I read, I analyzed as to why they crossed my path at any given time. 

In order to summarize my spiritual journey, I now knew that there were physical signs but also silent messages that may enter our life from time to time. I once heard this quote “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.” This quote had profound meaning to me. I didn’t know if I was ready. What was required to be ready, to make changes and what needed to be changed in which order. The only thing I knew was that I felt a difference inside and I was ready to listen and understand on a different level, a level that was new to me. Some say that this quote originated from Buddha, others will claim that it is fake. True or fake, I came across a article that steered me into the direction of Buddhism and spiritual awakening as it outlined the individual steps. Like a sponge I was absorbing and taking in all the information. I was hungry and curious to learn. I heard that people will believe what they want to believe and once again I was reminded that I was a optimist, a believer if you will. I engaged in the countless articles laid out in front of me and for the first time things started to make sense. I was relating and I wasn’t alone as I found myself identifying with the signs, physical, written and the not so obvious and silent ones. I believed that me, the student was ready and what transpired was that the teacher was appearing to open my eyes.

One article described the 7 stages to spiritual awakening. I found myself glued to it, nodding as if a lightbulb inside of my head had finally turned on. You could experience any of these steps in no particular order and I was beyond amazed to realize that I could relate to most stages. A transformation deep within, a shift in perception had begun, God knows when but I had a pretty good idea. I was finally waking up, although I never realized that I was asleep. Once again I felt that my life had passed me through mostly existence but not through being fully awake, being fully alive. Weird enough was that my experiences with the 7 stages went pretty much in order with how they were listed in the article and at least they were in the beginning. I believe that the first stage is vital to make the rest happen and I’m not sure if the other stages can occur without stage 1 as it involves life changing occurrences. 

To be continued…stay tuned. 

Xoxoxo ❤️

Posted in Adventure, Experience, Feelings, Health, Hiking, Human spirit, Inspiration, Life, Life lessons, Mother nature, Motivation,, My story, Photography, Self help, Spiritual awakening, Wisdom

A quick refresh 

Just a short stroll through the snow to refresh my mind and to reconnect with the peace and serenity I always find when I visit Mother Nature. 

It was a quick trip, chilly but beautiful, a quick reward after another dentist visit (I will write about at a later time) and the loss of #3 being the last and final extraction. The rest of my teeth are here to stay, for a long long time I hope. 

There is always something in life that could steal our smile, but I hope you remember to fight through it and never let anything get in between that. And if you can’t help it, because that does happen at times, I wish you that the time will be short and you learn to smile in biggest way once more. Even with two missing teeth, you can still smile big and find something to be grateful for. 

Have a beautiful day. Xoxoxoxo.

Posted in Experience, Health, Inspiration, Life, My story, Self help

Tooth-Fairy calling 

Last week was my first visit to the dentist in quiet some time. Not so fond memories from my past had kept me away by avoiding the dentist as if it was the plague. Finally, winning the battle in my mind and frankly being tired of procrastinating as I was always coming back to the same old thought of needing to see a dentist, I managed to squeeze into my big girl pants and so I went. It’s not so much that I’m worried about the pain but more so about the sounds emerging from the dentist office. I know, I know, headphones and maybe some “rocking that tooth out” kind of music could be beneficial. With no expectations, no ideas of how everything was going to unfold, I walked into the office. I would be lying if I said that I wasn’t nervous, nervous enough to raise my blood pressure, but here I was and there was no turning back now. 

Slightly off subject, I have to say that I had taken a huge liking to the “No expectations” kind of policy that I somehow found myself adapting to. Like so many things in life, I couldn’t say exactly when I had started to do so and it happened without feeling a shift through a significant occurrence. Somehow I got tired of driving myself crazy and my mind was adapting to this new way of life to stop interfering. It felt right for me and I liked it immediately once I became aware of what was happening. It allowed things to transpire the way they were meant to be, they would anyways, regardless of what I was thinking. The difference was that I didn’t give the ego permission to drive me insane through the countless thoughts that most likely would never come to fruition. Maybe it is that control thing and wanting to be prepared for every possible situation most humans strive for that causes us to mull things over and over in our minds. Me, on the other hand had reached a point I didn’t care much about that anymore and I don’t know if I truly ever did. Maybe I just never realized before. I was an open book, not afraid to be vulnerable and I simply stopped interfering with my own life. What I mean with that is that life always has a plan for us, whether we like it or not. Whether we understand it or not, I simply choose to embrace everything, good and bad and I stopped resisting and wanting to control the outcome. By saying this, it becomes clear to me that it is probably the only time that I went with the flow of my life, as I often find myself swimming upstream, against the grain and against the crowd and the most popular choice. 

Dropping my expectations has helped me avoid disappointments and saved me some headaches. Things always turn out much better than anticipated and may even bring some pleasant surprises if you manage not to drive yourself crazy prior to them. I’m sure my ego could have painted a gruesome picture torturing myself and sending me into anxiety for no reason at all about going to the dentist. And I’m sure it would have loved to entertain the “What if”. 

Last week, at the dentist I met some of nicest, most compassionate people as I felt the need to explain as to why I wasn’t particularly thrilled of sitting in the “torture lounger”. Another grim episode my mind could have whipped up if I only let it, but it proved itself that there was no torture at all even though I gripped the lounger a few times. What did happen, was that I immediately felt a connection strong enough to the people and their genuine care, including the experience that would put all my prior not so fond memories to rest. 

I could sleep in this morning, it’s my day off….sheer bliss as “My free time” means everything these days. Somehow I managed to stay up until midnight last night, exhausted and all I finally beat the little monster which kept me pinned on the couch and off to bed I went. I woke up at 6AM and decided to turn over and sleep a little more until the phone woke me next. A cancellation at my dentists office for later on today and a new chance for another visit as I need one more tooth extracted. I confirmed that I would be there and I can feel my mind wanting to drift. Hopeful it will go as smooth as it did last week, I will have to remind myself of what I just wrote and what my motto is so I am not a hypocrite unable to practice what I preach. I have to remember last week, how pleasant it was in the most unusual of encounters, while being able to call the dentist office pleasant. My mind naturally wants to wander and there is still the element of the unknown that takes me out of my comfort zone and that makes me worry. Perhaps I’m not quiet there yet and I haven’t laid the past to rest completely, but I’m on my way. I’m here to recognize the horror my ego is trying to instill and by doing so, I am in control and everything will be just fine. Wish me luck anyways hahaha. 

Posted in Experience, Feelings, Health, Human spirit, Inspiration, Life, Self help

Good-bye #18

I lost number 18 at the dentist today but I can’t complain. I have been lucky with my teeth for the most part of my life. Maybe I shouldn’t call it luck and I often think it’s because I never really cared about all that sweet stuff as a child. What a child that doesn’t like candy? Unheard of right? True though and to this day I don’t have much of a sweet tooth. There is the occasional craving that rises up every now and then, but which has to be followed up with a piece of sausage to get the sweets out of my mouth and to neutralize the taste as I would call it. Lol, yeah you heard right, a piece of sausage and meat will do too. So just maybe all the abstinence from sugar overkill may have saved my teeth in the long run. It has been years that I have been at the dentist due to a few bad experiences and the sound of that drill is something to behold even if there is no pain. It’s a bit like nails on a chalk board and it sends shivers of discomfort down my spine just thinking of it. There was no drill today buy I will take headphones from now on when there might be one. Going to the dentist today brought back some anxiety but also the soothing effects of feeling relieved that I finally took that first step and went. My blood pressure was elevated from sitting in that chair with all the medieval looking probing and torture tools surrounding me, but I also found myself relaxing as the feeling of relief swept over me. In the 2 1/2 hours that I was there, I surely had enough time to do so. The warrior spirit was alive and well as my dentist referred to me not once but three times that I was tough as nails. Personally I just think I have a high tolerance to pain, but there really wasn’t too much discomfort today. Thank you novocaine. 

#18 called for a root canal which had a 50/50 chance of being successful. I opted against it after the advice from my dentist (wow, she advised me about what would be best for me instead of trying to capitalize on making more money off of me) and I decided to say good-bye to #18 even though he had always served me well in chomping up my nutrition. The odds weren’t good enough and I needed a higher survival percentage in order to pay the high fee #18 demanded. 

I will have to go back a few more times I’m sure, for another extraction and routine cleaning etc. but I started and the experience was as great as it can be considering going to the dentist is great. I’m not sure if it will ever be my favorite thing, but the staff was amazing and made all the difference. And to look on the bright side of things and find my silver lining, I think it’s a hell of a diet plan to have a tooth extracted the day before thanksgiving as I am on soft and liquid food. Was I in the right frame of mind to do that or has this turned into an episode of “What was I thinking” Haha….I must have food withdraws as I only had a cup of chicken broth and a slice of pound cake which leaves me yearning for, yes you got it….sausage that I can’t really chew up now. I think I’m just making fun of myself and truly I have a thanksgiving kind of mind frame every day. Not always the food with turkey and all the fixings, but definitely always thankful for every lesson life has given me, for the people that surround me and make me a better person and for everything I have been blessed with. You see, I have a lot to be thankful for and I’m grateful for each one of you. 

Wishing you a Happy thanksgiving, peace on earth, fond memories with friends and family and many special moments.

Posted in Death, Emotions, Experience, Feelings, Human spirit, Inspiration, Life, Life lessons, Loss, Motivation,, My story, Photography, Purpose driven, Self help

Living vs. being ALIVE…

If you follow my blog then you know that the trail often calls my name and nature for me is a way to escape a life filled with responsibilities and duties. From time to time bits and pieces of my life flash by me like the segments of an old movie reel. Black and white images, frayed and shaking against the backdrop, trying to hold on, trying to find their place. For a moment my strength subsides and I yearn to lower my shield. Exhausted from having to be so strong, I look for a break where my vulnerability can roam without the fear of harms way. To drop the responsibility and to set my inner child free that never got to see its childhood come to full terms. It was my Dad’s tragic accidental death at the age of ten which signifies the end of my childhood and the begin of adulthood that came way to soon. 

Life as I knew it had stopped for me and I lost my hero and best friend that day. There was no professional help to cope with the loss and to this day I don’t think that my Mom ever realized how much my Dad’s death impacted my life. I’m sure she was trying to find her own way of dealing with the loss of her soulmate and now raising me on her own. I would like to think that overall she did a great job and I never got into any serious trouble and grew up with values, a great work ethic and manners. I wonder if that is really what it is all about because despite it being so, I never learned how to actually live and there are no schools that teach you what should be most important. Today and going forward my hunger to live more is greater than ever….

It was many years later that I realized that my childhood died with my Dad. In school I found it hard to relate to other kids and I simple had no place amongst the popular crowds. Not because I was “nerdy” but because I had nothing to share. There were no stories to tell, no adventures of what I did with my Dad last weekend and hearing the other kids talk, was nothing more than a painful reminder that I was alone. Eventually I avoided being around those scenarios and perhaps it was the beginning of my introversion. 

I lost my place in society as the place it offered to me was too painful to be around. Every once in awhile a faint memory of my childhood emerges that somehow had vanished until that moment. As if it was hidden in a way to protect myself from the trauma of my Dad’s death. Maybe it is to be revealed now and maybe my adult self is ready to deal with those moments better than I could at the age of ten. I recall the silly times with my Dad, the carefree moments of just laughing and letting my soul hang loose without fear and constraints. 

Today it is nature and the trail that offers that outlet to me along with a few very special People in my life. It is then and there when that inner child emerges and I hear the voice (literally) coming from within to play, to be silly and to be a part of what will become a lasting special memory. Urging me to drop life and all its seriousness for a moment and instead take as much time as possible to truly be alive. 

Picture from my backyard “Lake Tahoe” ❤️

Posted in Emotions, Experience, Feelings, Human spirit, Inspiration, Life, Life lessons, My story, Self help, Survival, Wisdom

When people give you Lemons ,

When people give you lemons, life will make you choose. You can either make lemonade and move on or become a victim. Life itself has a way of pushing us out of our comfort zone and the timing is seldom right. Or so we think and we feel unprepared and would much rather put things off. Maybe it is the ego that challenges us and instills doubt by making us believe that we are not ready. Not ready for the unknown and the fear of change is frightening us. Life as we know it, is about to take on new dimensions and we don’t know what to expect. And just maybe the changes are so huge that we can’t envision how they are going to fall into place. Just yet. We know that the road will tough, lined with obstacles and it won’t be easy. Our soul feels tired in ways that sleep can’t recover. And last but not least we are required to be strong because the warrior inside of us has been summoned once more to rise and fight for the life it seeks and deserves. 
Life has pushed me and life has finally grown tired of my procrastination. In a good way that is and the optimist in me knows that it is forcing me to put myself first for a change. And while I do find myself out of my comfort zone and a bit overwhelmed, I know this has been long overdue. I need to keep the focus as it is the only way. Timing might be everything, ready or not, and luckily if anything, my motto has always been to make lemonade. I’m a fighter and a warrior choosing the path of the light instead of the dark. 

Thank you all for your kind words and please know that I’m ok. I’m still processing and forging my path. My mind is tired and I hope you can be patient until I can come back and write more frequently. 
Hugs and best to all 

Xoxoxo 
Rhapsody Bohème ❤️

Posted in Emotions, Experience, Feelings, Human spirit, Inspiration, Life, Life lessons, Motivation,, My story, Purpose driven, Self help, Wisdom

And so it begins…

I know what’s next and so it begins.

Few things make me truly angry and while the initial anger, 

the feeling of deceit and betrayal subsides, 

I realize that everything is exactly how it needs to be. 

A new Canto in my life’s poem is about to begin.

And I embrace it with all my might. 
(Stay tuned….)

Posted in Experience, Human spirit, Humor, Life, My story, Self help

Boom….Doom?

A few days ago I lost my beloved “Faith bracelet” at work and I’m sure that by now somebody picked it up and it has found a new owner. I had worn it faithfully for many weeks and after several customers had commented on it, it became a regular wardrobe accessory. It’s not that it was the most valuable piece of jewelry I owned, but the message and that one word, had a special meaning and stirred my heart…and now it was gone. Now what? Was I doomed? I have to admit that it was a weird feeling that the bracelet was gone and I reminded myself that even though I no longer had it, by no means was it that all of my faith automatically had vanished with it. Of course I knew this and yet it felt as if I was waiting for something bad to happen. Something had to be lurking around the corner. I’d better prepare to slay the monsters when they emerged out of the dark. I better be ready. Last night (and it was dark I might add) I was sitting here on the couch, emerged in my iPad, reading and responding to comments on WordPress. Not a thought about the bracelet and I had forgotten all about it. Everything is fine and after awhile I decide to indulge myself into holding a real book (I’m a sucker for books and there is just something about holding the pages in your hand). I’m in for a real treat as I pick up “Lost on the Appalachian Trail” by a friend Kyle Rohrig (Mayor) who is also here on WordPress under themayorhikes.wordpress.com. You just have to check it out for yourself and believe me when I say that you won’t be disappointed. It’s a story of hiking the entire Appalachian Trail, a great tale of adventure, the strength of the human spirit, filled with challenges, overcoming and prevailing, as well as the wit, humor and just plain laugh out loud moments, even if they come at the expense of the author. I’m sure he can laugh about some of these moments by now and after successfully completing the PCT (Pacific Crest Trail) just recently, I’m sure many such moments have added to the memory bank since the Appalachian Trail. And on top of it it’s a great book for any animal lover as he shares the journey with his beloved “Catfox” Katana a Siba Inu with a mind of her own. And so it was that I’m sitting here, by myself, in the middle of the night laughing out loud reading his words. They describe the situation so vivid and in such great detail that I can visualize the whole thing and feel as if I’m right there.

I read for awhile, it’s getting late and I’m going to check WordPress one more time before bed. I grab the iPad and there is nothing but the “Black screen of death”. Initially I didn’t even know such a thing existed. It’s literally non responsive and I can’t turn it on or off, heck who even knew if it was on or off. All there is, is the black screen. I mess around with it for awhile to no avail and eventually have to give up because it’s almost midnight and I have to work early in the morning.

In bed by now, I try to forget about the whole thing and put worries aside as the thoughts of self demise creep in. Oh my goodness how am I going to write my blog, pay my bills online, do I have to get another iPad, and worse has somebody hacked me and is stealing my blog. Needless to say I couldn’t sleep and I grab the iPad once more. I alternately hit the home button and the power button while nothing happens and I guess I’m talking to myself throughout the whole process. All of a sudden, black screen and all, I hear Siri saying “Mmmmh, that’s an interesting question Rhapsody”. Definitely not what I had expected at this point (not funny Siri) but it’s comical now, even though last night was a different story. She talked a few more times but that was all I got as far as any response trying to restore the iPad. Still paranoid with my mind taking off into all kinds of weird directions, oh wait ….this is all happening because I lost my “Faith Bracelets”, I now grab the iPhone. I have to check for any suspicious activity, even check my finances to see if aliens have taking over demanding a ransom in exchange for a working and functioning iPad. Nothing, until I finally get the brilliant idea to google the cause for the “Black screen of death” and you might say “Gee what took you so long”. I know right, I know, but in my defense, it was late and I think I had left all of my brain cells at work over the past few days. I was mentally exhausted. But luckily enough my brain managed to produce one more brilliant thought for the day and I found a tip on how to fix the non responsive screen. Hold the home and power button at the same time and count to ten. Seven, eight, nine and then magic…..tah tah and miraculously the apple icon appears and the gadget springs back into action as if nothing ever happened. Ahhh major relief….

I’m sure some of you can relate and have similar stories. And I’m sure some of you smile at my little story by now. Perhaps it was payback and karma for laughing at some of Kyle’s trail mishaps, but why ….it was all in good fun and I meant no harm. For sure it was merely a reminder of how dependent we have become in regards to our technology. Heaven forbid if we had to return to our old ways, perhaps even write a paper check. Do you remember those times? But for tonight I slay’ed the doom and all of its monsters. Peace is restored once more as I drift off to sleep and rest assured 😉

Posted in Experience, Human spirit, Inspiration, Life, Motivation,, My story, Purpose driven, Self help

When I grow up…

Driving to work this morning, I had a feeling as if I was driving into the wrong direction. I wanted to drive “from” work instead of “to” work, to go back doing what I love, back to the trail or back to writing. Don’t get me wrong I like my job and once I got going the day actually flew by. I love being in a position that allows me to contribute and I’m lucky that I can make a difference for some people. But let’s face it, if I had to choose between going to work and being able to make a difference writing, it’s a no brainer which one I would choose. Writing is a much bigger platform and your work has no limits as to how many people you can reach worldwide. I was beginning to feel that the modest confines of my “work building” and the handful of people that I could reach, were simply not enough anymore. But for now, nothing changed and whoever I could reach in some way, would remain equally important to me. In a strange way my intuition said that I was about to embark on something great. I didn’t know what that would be and I had no expectations about the future, but already i had found something great in the people that I had met here on WordPress. I had found a purpose that was lacking before. Maybe that was linked to my hunch about what was lying ahead and time would tell as it always does. 

While driving I was indulging myself in dreams and vaguely thoughts flashed by me like little messengers trying to direct my thoughts. I realized that never before had I known with such intend what I wanted to be when I grow up. And while I was well into my adult years, I came to the conclusion that perhaps I had chased a career that was never meant to be for me. If anything stood out from it, it would be that it is never too late to change and that anything is possible. I reminded myself quiet often of it and I knew that it had become my motto. Something that I held onto, something that was giving me the inspiration to believe. So now what? Was this the moment I jump off the hamster wheel?

Three month ago as I started this blog, I wanted to be a writer and felt a strong calling to put my thoughts onto paper. A week ago this happened and the humble little blog has grown to over 200 followers. I’m truly amazed about the support and the love you have shown me and I can’t thank you enough. 

This encompasses so much I want to mention and yet for some reason I feel challenged to find the right words to truly pay homage to you. Nothing can express my gratitude for your time spent, for your comments to my posts and the encouragements to keep going . While your words and feedback means the world, they also allow me a glimpse into your lives and I love to meet new people on a daily basis. 

I’m not sure if there will ever be a point when the words will cease, where there is nothing to convey, but I surely hope I never see that day. Frankly I didn’t know what to expect as I started and I remember thinking about how cool it would be to be a writer. I guess I have achieved that and somebody once said that if you write every day, well then you are a writer. I never said that I was a good writer, but good or bad, I write. Mission accomplished, right? Well not exactly and my mission has changed a bit.

The bar is raised and my goals have changed. I owe this new wonderful dream to a few very special individuals that have inspired me through their words to become a storyteller. No longer do I want to convey just content and data and I hope it was never as drastic as it sounds. To me there is magic in storytelling and it’s a place that captures the reader in an escape from a reality that might have become too serious. To help you feel good inside and to inspire hope and believe. Perhaps to make you pause and re-evaluate what is truly important in your hectic life. To indulge yourself in magic and reaffirm that you are not alone. To remind you that others have been on that same path you find yourself on and comfort your journey. To free that inner child and laugh until it hurts. 

I have grown up a long time ago, but I don’t take myself too seriously and try to remain a kid at heart. I have to say that it is for the first time that I truly know where my place is in this world. What I want from life, how I want to contribute to society and how I want to refine who I am growing into as a person. And even now after all these years, it is that I realize more than ever that it is never too late to change your stars. 

As for me, I dream to whisk you away and weave you up in the magic of storytelling. To help you escape and pursue your hopes and dreams. And for you I hope you shoot for the stars and make your own magic come alive in any way you possibly can. 

Xoxoxoxo ❤️