Posted in Inspiration, Life, Rain

Pluviophile

“Sometimes it rains, but we don’t get wet”

Pluviophile (n) a lover of rain; someone who finds joy and peace of mind during rainy days.

The forecast called for rain last night and this morning. I was hoping that it wouldn’t miss me and instead provide a good and steady cleansing throughout the night. And it did. I woke several times hearing the drops hit the tin roof, heavier and softer at times. I immediately felt wrapped in comfort. I even slept decent which I was surprised of. For one because it was only my second night on the new mattress, and secondly because life happened in several areas yesterday. Not really anything that is a surprise, and one thing has been a long time in the making, but something that was finally put into action. No matter how hard I tried, no matter how much I get it and saw it coming, it got to me in the worst way. In the end I got some poetry out of it and named it “Coward,” making peace with myself and the feelings involved. But not before feeling a great deal of emotional, mental and physical pain yesterday. My health went right down the drain, to the point that I got pretty badly by the time I went to bed, contemplating if I should even go to bed and have another rough night. Well I am glad I did, and thank god the pain at that intensity was temporary. Then, came the rain, along with some pain meds and washed it all away, and I’m grateful.

In the far distance lightening strikes illuminated the night sky, but luckily no new fires have been reported. It rained the entire morning and it was wonderful. Cuddling with Cinnamon while looking out into the forest, watching the trees sway and my prayer flags dance in the wind. That’s at least what I was looking at, and I think she was more interested in the lizards occupying the little dirt mount. There I found further peace and serenity with all that is and all that will be. For some reason the rain brought out the playful nature in me this morning. Something I have seen too little of lately, and I made a promise to myself to make sure it never gets diminished again. Not by myself and definitely not by others. That power is reserved for ourselves and doesn’t belong into the pocket of others. The morning continued with good, hot coffee, morning snuggles with my favorite girl and singing and laughing. A few remnants from the day before still lingered and a little metal (heavy metal music) this morning with a song from Slaughter had me dancing and singing as if I had gone mad about you. More…please.

Posted in Life, Rain, Self care

Welcome the Rain

Picture: Google

A rare occurrence happened here in the desert today. It thundered and rained, for hours, at times downright pouring moisture from the sky. Several times I found myself drawn to the window, to listen to the thunder, to watch the drops falling, and to listen to the sound as they made impact with the roof of this house. My house, my home of 20 years. It probably be the last time that I’d hear this sound within these walls. I paused to take it all in, I wanted to remember the feeling.

I was thinking about how much I love the rain. From the sound, the cleansing metaphor of the landscape and the fragrant smell of wet sagebrush. How much I love to hike in a gentle mist, remembering the feeling of peace and serenity. It wasn’t long until I realized that it was that very feeling I was missing and yearning for. There hasn’t been much peace lately and listening to the rain falling took me back in a way, sorting what’s important, reminding me of who I am. Not that it all could be summed up in a thunderstorm.

It made me think of Germany where rain is in abundance. I remembered my time there and enjoying the mid summer showers that never lasted too long but cleaned the air, washing all the troubles away, even if just for a little while.

Physically, I felt strong today. The barometric pressure broke with the storm moving through and so did my pain levels. I was still fighting the fatigue and my body was still tired, but I didn’t feel super achy which makes all the difference.

On the Homefront, we were on a need to speak basis and a few uglies surfaced last night. “The tongue has no bones yet it is strong enough to break a heart.” And this is exactly what happened last night. It’s amazing how many times this old heart has broken already. You’d think there is nothing left to break, and yet the daggers still get through and hit like a bullseye right in the middle. I know it is because you are fighting your own battles and because you are afraid. And still, it’s not a comfort for me nor a consultation for you. These words linger and they have for years. These words, spoken in anger or fear are impossible to take back. We have reached the point where an apology does no longer suffice.

Here I am, standing at the window, remembering a book titled to welcome the rain. A title meant to remind me to dance in the rain, to jump in the puddles, to embrace the pain. To not mind getting wet and soaked, to let it wash away the tears and worries for awhile. I hope it will rain for quite some time yet.