Posted in Healing, Health, Life

Back amongst the living

I’m happy to report that I have beaten the nasty bug (well….mostly) that rendered me badly ill for several days. It appears I am returning to the living for a little longer and here I go again with new stories to tell and new insights to be appreciated. At the beginning of getting sick, I stressed out about the most horrendous timing and how much stuff there was still left to do. I nearly caused myself a panic attack and as I look back I say “aren’t most of these panic attacks self induced?” We always tend to paint a much uglier picture than reality truly is, but then again, it wouldn’t be us if we didn’t. Heaven knows that we try hard to be in control and prepared whatever life throws our way.

Once the panic subsided a bit, I quickly really that there wasn’t anything I could do about it. Now matter how much I stressed, things would be the same whether I approached nerve wrecked or from a calmer point of view. It was then that I entered a more restful phase. I allowed my body to heal and slept nearly three days and three nights. Not continuously, but mostly. I got up long enough to go to the bathroom and drink some chicken broth and elderberry syrup, ate some fruit that my cousin dropped in front of my door via care packet twice…what an angel…but that was pretty much it. I surrendered and I gave up worrying. Probably one of the best things I could do. I took the time to get better and slowly I did, although it still lingers and I still have to be careful over a week later.

As I was left there with my thoughts about all my outstanding chores, I was trying to understand why this was happening. What was my message in this, was it truly the fault of the new RA meds that compromised my immune system, was I working too hard, running myself into the ground with unrealistic expectations? After all I came here with the understanding that “I” had to look at EVERYTHING. Every corner, every angle, and why? I soon realized that it was to find closure in this chapter. Had Mom hidden something for me? Was there a written note, something she could never verbalize to my face? Others believed that there is, or was a treasure in the house. Further pushing me to find something I never even knew existed. I put myself in a position as if I was dependent on finding these things to attain closure. Inadvertently I put more pressure and stress onto myself and it was finally now, being and all, that I could acknowledge and validate it for what it was. The panic turned into a calm heart and all of a sudden I felt content. There was so much I had accomplished already. So much I had felt already. So much I knew with certainty in my heart now. And then came the most beautiful message of all….

It became apparent that long ago I had already received the treasure. It can come in the form of a decision, an understanding, a coming to terms and being able to live with it, an inner peace, a calming sensation, a knowing, a feeling what was once unclear, stuff like that. I didn’t need to see things written out on paper anymore that my heart now knew. I felt that the illness was warranted to give me time to re-evaluate. To not get so hung up on the process and reprioritize what truly matters, and how I want to spent my remaining time here. It’s been work nearly 99% of the time while so many other important things need my attention to repair some of my own heartstrings and bring meaning to others. Perhaps it was also to stop the madness and only take as little as possible because let me tell you, it is not cheap by any means to ship to the US. You better have a strong attachment to the things you want to bring. So I am reevaluating and while I’m doing so, it appears that all of a sudden I might actually be ahead of the game vs losing time to sickness and panicking from being behind. Living a tiny life has also prepared me for my now and i won’t add clutter to my life anymore. I like it simply, with less responsibilities and that in itself is a treasure to behold. Life sure has a funny way yo teach us things, although my funnies have seldom be funnies. They are always extreme, I can’t be stopped any other way and it always has to be something serious to halt me. Well, I am halted, I am listening, I am acknowledging, and I am making the chances necessary.

Posted in Health, Journey

Slow progress

It’s been a week since I came down with this nasty bug that had me sleep for three days and three nights. Only slowly can I see little improvements here and there, but nighttime now poses a challenge. At first I could sleep whenever, now I get to fight coughing attacks as my body tries to expel all that congestion that is still stealing my voice and clogging my chest and lungs. It is worse when laying down as everything is settling then.

After four days of downtime I made it out of the house for the first time to drive “Dad” to another doctors appointment. I felt decent but the next day my body behaved as if I was experiencing a relapse for the worse again. Still I pushed on, one half hour of work, and one half hour of rest seemed to be the motto for the day. At least at a snails pace, I was still moving forward. And at least it brought a little peace of mind.

Posted in Alternative Medicine, Healing, Health

Eat the rainbow

It’s pretty magical whenever a rainbow shows up in the sky and for many it’s considered a lucky sign as we imagine a pot of gold at the end of it and little leprechauns with cloves, dressed in green come to mind. I also heard of the wonderful tale that a rainbow consist of all the happy tears that people cried during moments of happiness. So perhaps you smile just a little more remembering this the next time you see one. But have you heard the phrase “Eat the rainbow?” It’s long known that fruits and vegetables are good for our overall health, but it’s also said that every color of the rainbow supports our health and organs in a different way, so take look at this list and see where you need some help. Let’s start with red and if you some help here, focus on eating red fruits and veggies, and so on.

Red – lycopene – supportive of the heart, blood, skin & nerve health .

Orange – carotenoids – supportive of hair, skin, & eye health.

Yellow – bioflavonoids- supportive of heart, vision, joints, tissues, digestion & immune system.

Green – chlorophyll – supportive of digestion, vision, bones & immune system.

Purple – anthocyanin – supportive of heart, blood, improves memory & nerve health.

Posted in Chronic illness, Health

Down for the count…again

It am trying so hard to keep a healthy balance and eat and do things that are healthy and good for me. It’s hard however and plenty of challenges such as no running water are one of the biggest issues I deal with. Therefore I don’t wash hands enough and the sanitizer has become my best friend.

It was last Wednesday, after the signing that I felt a little tickle in the throat. By Thursday evening it was confirmed that it wouldn’t go away and something was lingering in the bushes for me. Friday morning I had to cancel getting rid of the huge amounts of cardboard and electro garbage and it seems I’ve been sleeping ever since. Splendid timing and honestly it’s freaking me out, but there isn’t a thing I can do.

I couldn’t pay my last respects at a funeral and missed an important birthday. I haven’t let anyone come near me and today perhaps in between sweating and chills periodically, it’s been the longest I’ve been woke. I need to be healthy quick and to be honest, I’ve had a few scary scary moments, questioning if I’d get there again. I can’t remember the last time I felt this terrible. A few times I seriously wondered, hearing myself say “Is this how it ends?” I’m not out of the woods and I haven’t been this sick in years. It did say on the RA medicine though that it would weaken my immune system and compromise me being able to fight off infections. Yeah go figure…🙄

Posted in Choices, Health, Inspiration

Pick your poison and the power of choice

There is always a decision to make. We have the gift of choice. And when it comes to our energy and vitality we have more input that we might be aware of. Take a look at these examples of what either gives you energy to power through all of your must do’s, or what takes it away.

Let’s start with the energy givers: a glass of water, sunlight, nourishing food, exercise, laughter, cuddles with a pet, self-care, meditation, visualization, reading, music, fresh air, friends & family, creativity, writing, journaling setting intentions and even sleep.

Now let’s look at the energy takers: overthinking, screens & social media, clutter, dehydration, an inconsistent sleep pattern, possibly certain foods & alcohol dependency, people pleasing, setting unrealistic goals, unclear & sloppy boundaries, negativity, and going-going-going without rest.

Looking at the two lists, some issues especially when it comes to the energy takers may not be in our control especially when it comes to inconsistent sleep. My pattern might be the same as far as what time I like to go to bed, but the quality of sleep is not always there for me depending on the pain level I experience at that given time. But most of those things listed are powerful and simple things we all can implement more or less thereof. So here we go, let’s pick our poison and miracle drug. It doesn’t always have to be complicated and sometimes it’s just that simple.

Posted in Adoption, Family, Health, Life

Another Mile-Stone

It was a good day and another milestone entered our life’s and brought the much needed relief. My late Dad is battling Cancer, had a leg amputated in 2020, and has a few other concerns currently that need to be looked at and addressed ASAP.

We had a follow up visit for his liver cancer the other day and during the prior one it was noted that no further treatment was needed due to the cancer did not advance. That was good news then and here were hoping to hear something similar this time. And truly our wish came true and not only had the cancer not advanced, it was also noted that it was going into remission. You can imagine what relief it was to be given the news.

During my time here so far, I have gotten even closer to my uncle, now my Dad. I have to admit that I miss him when I stay here in the house to do my work and not see him for a day or two. I never thought the day would come again that someone would wait for me over here in Germany and that I would miss someone to this extend. I thought it had ended as Mom passed away and yet here I am feeling the same pain I always felt when I had to leave her. It seems to be my curse yo be always stuck in the middle because no matter where I am, here or in the States, someone is always left behind and my heart breaks.

I remember prior to coming here, and all the days I cried and cried because I didn’t want to leave my Cinnamon Girl and loved ones. Now, here, my trip is nearly halfway over already and the emotions are starting to run high already, about that day when paths part again and someone is left behind. I am reminded that this could be very well the last time we see each other and I don’t even want to think about that. For right now I want to celebrate the good news about a cancer on remission and a new chance at life.

Posted in Chronic illness, Health, Inspiration

Ruhe Bank (Serenity bench)

It was the weekend of my brothers Wedding that I decided it was finally time for a little rest and break from all the hectic. Since it was snowing for two days, it seemed like the perfect scenario for some downtime. Friday was the wedding and Saturday was more or less just a chill day with family.

I went to bed around 10PM feeling tired from doing nothing I suppose. Everything was fine until 2:30AM as I woke in excruciating pain. Somehow I managed to take one of my steroids, but to no avail. For the rest of the night I didn’t sleep anymore. Somehow I dragged myself to the bathroom and even that required a few breaks, fighting dizziness and the strain it took on me to move despite the pain.

Finally back min bed, I laid there, waiting, hoping and praying for the meds to kick in, but they never did. Morning was dawning and it wasn’t until 9:30AM that I finally managed to make my way downstairs. The stairs looked intimidating and my mind was raising about all the possibilities of what could be going on. This wasn’t suppose to happen, I was under medical care, taking my meds daily and faithfully.

Throughout the day the pain eases a little so it seemed, to perhaps I had adjusted to tolerating it. I needed assistance with everything and couldn’t even hold a coffee cup to drink my tea. I managed three cups throughout the day and ate a small sandwich in the evening because I obviously raised concern and worries. I refused the call for a doctor and acted convinced that all would be ok, even though I wasn’t myself.

I slept for much of the day and found it difficult to get comfortable anywhere. Everything was hurting and just sitting still präsentes a challenge. I went to bed early that evening and was surprised that I could sleep more and that I wasn’t wide awake after a day of nothing. The next day I woke up nearly fully restored and as fast as this flare or whatever it was had surfaced, it also disappeared. I was still a little weak, not having my full strengths, but by god, what a difference. What followed was a day of house arrest and I wasn’t allowed to go to work just yet which was probably a good thing, but still… I definitely wasn’t used to house arrest at my age haha, but I suppose I scared everyone half to death, including myself.

I still don’t know what caused the sudden outburst, except that our body tells when things get too much. Maybe I had overdone myself, working every day and not taking enough breaks or a day off for myself. Somehow the balance got tipped and my body gave me a reminder of how quickly and drastic things can change. I am grateful that everything is ok again and while I am attacking my projects again, I am also remembering to be good to myself.

Posted in Freedom, Health, Inspiration

Re-wilding for Humans

You have seen the survivor shows on TV and what to do if you were stranded in the wild, but seriously, how would you stack up if you were dropped off into the wilderness for 30 days without food, water and shelter? If you had to forage with no phone signal and the internet to research edible plants. As most of the modern population, we’d probably be petrified and without a clue, including myself. We simple don’t have the skills to survive on our own and we have become dependent.

Even exercising has moved mainly to indoor facilities and there is definite disconnect between ourselves and the wild…Mother Nature. There is no doubt that times have changed and the Industrial Age, as well as the technology age have made life much easier for us. Everything is at our fingertips, yet we have become dependent, domesticated, unable to fend for ourselves. And while we think that life is much simples for us, while we couldn’t imagine how our ancestors lived not even that long ago, we lay the prize and it’s label is called our health.

So how do we re-wild ourselves? No, we don’t need to live in caves, we don’t have to give up our modern conveniences, but we have to seek balance and that balance for example might require us to give up some of our time spent on technology devices. It can be as simple as going for a walk on your lunch break. Here are a few more things to consider to tip the balance and be more in tune with your “wild.”

Join a foraging class or take an herbalism course that will teach you further how to identify plants and their healing benefits.

Turn off your gadgets and simply unplug. Listen to the silence and feel the bliss growing within.

Balance your circadian rhythm and follow a schedule for bedtime and rising with the sun.

Take a roadtrip and go camping. Feeling the earth beneath you while spending time getting plenty of vitamin D and fresh air.

Walk barefoot for 30 minutes a day and ground yourself with the earth for many benefits such as better sleep, stress reduction and reducing inflammation.

Gardening and putting your hands into the soil has similar health properties.

How about taking your exercise routine outdoors?

Spend time naked…here is a fun one that might need a little extra planning 🙂

Dance freely. Shake and shimmy your body.

Sit beneath a tree and just listen. And if you feel inclined give it a giant Hug.

Notice the animals around you.

I believe there is something to choose for all of us to impact our life for the better. What are we waiting on? I think a little structure and daily reminders might help make a difference. Stay tuned as ideas are starting to enter my mind about how we can do a better job of that.

Posted in Fasting, Healing, Health

Fasting, Weight Loss, and Autophagy

I am doing further research on the subject of repairing the body on a cellular level and the how fasting can play a huge role in it. Today I will see my doctor again as a follow up to a prior visit and most likely any help that can, or will be extended, will be in the form of harsh pharmaceuticals only. Not my gig, but I with little choices and running out of time, I will have to do what needs to be done. The last straw for me now is the subject of fasting and what happens to the body. I will quote an article by Christian Coulson from 2020.

Fasting is not only for weight loss but also autophagy, something I never even heard of before and here is a closer look to what happens to us during the fast.

The Fed State (0-6 hours) After having your last meal, blood glucose levels rise. The increase will promote insulin secretion and stimulate protein synthesis as a signal to move glucose into the cell to be used as energy. The excess glucose will then be stored in the liver in the form of glycogen. The liver will store glycogen to reduce blood glucose and have energy during times of low food availability. The liver, however, can only store around 100g of glycogen and the excess is stored as fat.

The postabsorptive stage (6-24 hours) after 6 hours, blood glucose levels start to decrease, this leads to a decrease in insulin and an increase in glucagon, furthermore, the liver breaks down glycogen into glucose to be used as energy. When there is no intake of glucose, glucagon will serve to move glycogen stores as well as to prevent fatty acid synthesis.

Gluconeogenic stage (1-2 days) After 24 hours, you’ve used most of your glycogen stores. Consequently, your body starts transitioning from using glucose to using fat for energy. However, due to fats being difficult to access and be delivered where needed, this transition can take some time. Meanwhile, your body breaks down amino acids into glucose for energy in a process called gluconeogenesis.

Ketonic stage (2-3 days) One of the stages of fasting is the ketonic stage. At this point, your body starts entering ketosis. The decrease in insulin serves as a signal of low energy availability and promotes the break down of fats for energy. Fats are broken down into three fatty acids and glycerol. Fatty acids will be used as energy by most tissues. Glycerol, on the other hand, will be used to produce glucose, since some other tissues, such as the brain and red blood cells still need it.

Protein conservation (4+ days) After day four, your body relies mostly on fatty acids and ketones for energy. It also releases Hugh amounts of human growth hormone to maintain tissues and muscle mass.

Depending on how big your last meal was, you can expect to start burning fat after fasting for 6-24 hours. For most people, it ends up being around 12 hours. When you enter a fasted state, your body can burn the stored fat that it couldn’t access during the fed state. Here is a more in depth look

4-8 hours. Blood sugar and insulin levels drop.

12 hours. Food eaten has most likely been burned, digestive system starts resting, body begins the healing process, human growth hormone (HGH) increases, and glucagon is released to balance blood sugar.

14 hours. HGH keeps increasing and body begins to burn fat as energy.

16 hours. Fat burning increases.

18 hours. HGH increases even more.

18-20 hours. Autophagy starts to kick in and ketones are released.

36 hours. Autophagy increases by 300%.

48 hours. Cellular regeneration starts, and inflammation starts going down. Autophagy increases 30% more.

72 hours. Autophagy peaks.

Autophagy stands for cellular regeneration. During fasting, since you are not eating, your body is not getting enough nutrients. The lack of nutrients will force your body to break down old proteins and cells to get energy. Basically, autophagy forces your body to clean out the old, unwanted, and unneeded cells, as well as recycling and fixing damaged parts. During the period of refeeding, your body then starts creating new cells. Many people use fasting and autophagy to prevent cancer by destroying old cells.

All in all it sounds like a great opportunity to explore for me. Not only for getting a few extra pounds off and weight loss, but mainly to follow my theory on the subject to “Fix the cell to be well.” I think it is worth a try and I will definitely give it the green light.

Posted in Chronic illness, Disease, Fasting, Health

Fasting for better overall health

Fasting is something I’ve never dabbled in when it comes to my health. I once incorporated a day of nothing but fruit and another days of nothing but vegetables, and besides my Green Juice that I made faithfully for the longest time, new evidence is stepping forward to revisit some of this content with new knowledge.

Just yesterday I posted about fixing the body on a cellular level and I can still here the slogan that goes “Fix the cell to be well.” In my list of what we can do to improve our cellular health it was fasting that stood out to me and begged to be explored further. I did some research and I believe I am on to something. It’s a feeling, a hunch, I have experienced every time I had a major breakthrough. It feels a little like being lost and finding the trail again as it fills me with new energy to pursue this theory and learn more. Like I have finally arrived and found that next step.

According to the Cellular health institute and a recent study it is suggested that fasting for three consecutive days can completely reboot the immune system. This is possible because when your system is starved, your body begins producing new white blood cells via stem cells, and white blood cells help our bodies to fight infection. In essence the study showed that three days of fasting “flips a switch” to ignite regeneration of the immune system, and is especially helpful for those with already damaged immune systems. Dr. Valter Longo observed dramatic healing in patients of whom had gut issues that were impeding the healing of other coexisting conditions. One gut issue frequently noted is leaky gut, and a diet of GMO’s, grains, sugars and other toxins which are the root of the condition.

Fasting is an ancient healing tool and it works. When you ingest only liquid, ideally in the form of water, functional medicine foods or bone broth, the gut is given time to “heal and seal.” Fasting starves down all bacteria, good and bad, and post-fat the gut is re-inoculated with good bacteria to reset. Fasting also helps to bring nutrition to a depleted body and remains the fastest way to stimulate the healing of a variety of health conditions.

It is suggested here to do this reboot for three consecutive days and I will explore alternative ways of fasting such as intermittent fasting and what happens to our body during particular timeframes in a future post. It’s very interesting and once again it speaks to me and makes sense. Stay tuned to find out just how long it will take for your body to switch over, burning fat for energy (weight loss) and kick out the old damaged cells to build new healthy ones. It sounds like fasting plays an essential role in this reset of repairing and building better cellular health.