Last week amongst a challenging week of loss, doctor’s office visits, and other difficult responsibilities, something super cool and positive happened for me also. I was chosen, worthy, picked, tagged and selected, at least it’s how it felt when a random act of kindness found me and took me by surprise. Someone linked to my blog and for a writer (although the link wasn’t to original content that was shared) there is no greater gift and accomplishment than being heard. To have your words being read, perhaps commented on and to top it off, have it shared.
Last week the little blog, now grown to nearly 3500 followers, received a lot of traffic and was up a whopping 423% for the week. At first I couldn’t figure out what was going on and where all the added interest came from, but then I saw that one of my referrers, directing traffic to my site was no other than Upworthy. Have you heard of Upworthy.com, how amazing is that. Please take a look if you are not familiar with their site.
Upworthy is a website dedicated to positive storytelling. It started in March 2012 by Eli Pariser, the former executive director of MoveOn, and Peter Koechley, the former managing editor of The Onion. One of Facebook’s co-founders, Chris Hughes was an early investor. In 2017, the company was acquired by Good Worldwide.
What a neat concept and mission. Thank you for making my day and my week. For picking my site, bringing interest and traffic to what I share. To making me feel that my voice matters. My mission on here is similar to yours as I share positivity and inspiration, that includes my journey of overcoming a chronic dis-ease, finding positivity in the challenges of our lives, as well as the daily pondering to the deeper meanings of our existence and reactions/feelings. Thank you for choosing ME with this random act of kindness that made a big difference and made my week. I hope you get to see this because you too should know how your actions have made a difference. Thank you 🙏🏼💙
We lost a loved one last Friday and it’s been a week. She was a mother, a sister, a wife, aunt and godmother. It was a tough road leading up to it and in the end no further help could be given after a full month stay in the hospital. In other words, “we knew” and it was an expected death. And yet how do you ever prepare for it, knowing or not, it stings just the same and is a very difficult transition for most who are left behind to deal with a loss. I have experienced death for too many times it seems. Expected or unexpected, I wonder which is easier. It’s a question no answer can be given to.
Death is a subject we all face at some point. It is also a subject many fear or don’t like to think about. Perhaps it is the unknown, not being in control and having no say so in the matter. Nor knowing when our time comes and what death has in store for us. Will it be quick, or will we suffer for many years! Death freezes our blood and chokes our breath as we all have to stare into the eyes of death at some point. So perhaps at this point it is easier to dismiss the unknown that induces fear and stow the thought as far away as possible from our conscious. Yet it is imminent and just a matter of time. But some things are better not known as they would overshadow the rest of our days and I think this is one such thing.
Death leaves us helpless when we witness someone else facing it other than ourselves. It leaves us with little consolation such as knowing that the suffering is over and that they have transitioned to a place of no pain. To know that they live on through us and merely moved into another form without the need for a body. That they have fulfilled their purpose here on earth, in their body and that their soul lives on. Still we will never talk to them and see them in our old familiar way again. I think this is what makes it so difficult and it’s not that we will have a visit with their soul at some point and time. Perhaps we will and nothing is impossible, but whether we could even realize it from our end or theirs is highly unlikely.
Death is final and changes us instantly. Life will never be the same and no matter how strong we try to be, how hard we try to hold it all together, death always has the final word and will revisit us over and over. It’s then, that the memory surfaces in the tears that roll down our face, in the family traditions that are not quite the same anymore, in the familiar chats, talks, hugs, and love that is left unexpressed with nowhere to go. Death is final and none of us get out of here alive.
Have you seen the full moon yet? As we look to the night sky tonight, we welcome February’s snow moon. Perhaps you have noticed a certain glow in the sky, and perhaps you have felt the intense energy that comes with most full moons. This one is no different as masculine Mars, God of war and feminine Venus, Goddess of love meet and amplify our feelings. Intense energy seems to be the theme song of 2022 so far and we are moving ahead at warp speed.
As I reflect back onto the week, the month, and even the year so far, I see many influences and potent, powerful energy that is emerging. Sometimes we are holding on to the seat of our pants it feels like but everything is going exactly as it must and we are being encouraged and reminded to trust the process. Too long have we laid the groundwork, waited in the dark, hoping to reap the rewards at some point. This is the time dear friends and this moon will illuminate what has been dark within us. The blindfolds are coming off. It is as if you are seeing with new eyes and perhaps for the very first time. The picture is getting clearer and the is lifting. Face the truth.
We have been talking about balance lately and how it is key to a peaceful life. This has been one of the biggest lessons for me so far in 2022 and balance is truly tan important element. This moon is all about balance between being and doing, between the masculine and the feminine, between being serious and disciplined and light and joyful. Everything has two sides and leaning too much into one direction will affect our balance and overall stance, as well as our preparedness. We either become too hard or too soft and the challenge lies in finding that middle ground.
This full moon and it’s lighting up the night-sky reminds us that it is almost glow time. It’s a time to believe in ourselves for we have laid the groundwork and this is the time to be wholeheartedly US, YOU, OURSELVES! Trust that new sense of confidence you are feeling. You earned it and it is no fluke. It is not mere coincidence but it is here to stay. Embrace your authentic and creative self. Own your light even if it grows dim at times. Everyone experiences times like these when our light doesn’t shine the strongest, but this is not the time and you are moving ahead, leaving behind the old and outdated. Tap into the full moon and replenish yourself. Get the makeover you’ve been thinking about and make the changes in a certain area of your life. The time is now and you are supported and encouraged. Take that leap of faith. Wipe that slate clean and start writing your own history as you step out of the shadows to embrace your new beginning. As you honor the emotional needs of those around you, ensure you honor your own needs and emotions as well. Balance is the key.
This is the time to align yourself with your life purpose and value in life. Your meditations and prayers should include what you wish to magnetize into your life. Is it optimism, gratitude, community and support, all themes around this full moon. Take time to reflect, take time to do some self care and keep opening your heart to love as love is the answer to all and is already there for you.
I recently posted about a new term I learned. Existential depression. Please take a moment and catch up with this previous post if you have never heard about it.
I am a gifted child who feels too much. I am an empath who often takes on the burdens, not only of the world, but also the burdens of others. I question things, my life, the deeper meanings, the things that involve my purpose, my mission, my journey in this body, on this plane, called Earth. I am a gifted child and perhaps sometimes my gift hurts those around me who love me, simply because they feel helpless and wished I’d care just a little less. But isn’t that the problem with the world? Feeling too little? Have you ever encountered someone who cared just a little less? Who has been desensitized and no matter what happens, they are always stuck “in business as usual” mode? I bet you got hurt in some way because of his/her actions.
Have you ever wondered what would be if we all cared just a little less? Would this world be in even greater chaos than it already is? Haven’t we gotten enough of that already? Personally I believe that a little extra care and this gift is what is needed more in times like these. I see the gifted but also everyone else who stands up for what is right as a part of an important group, a group that is helping to create a new world. A world that inspires one person at a time, through actions, deeds and one random act of kindness at a time. Yes we do get hurt more, yes it’s painful to watch, even heartbreaking, but it’s also the very essence, our uniqueness and what makes us special in our own way.
There are some things in life I have come to accept without questioning them much further. “It is what it is” seems a good enough explanation and I leave it be. Some of those things have been painful and it’s almost a soul – body disconnect as if my soul is protecting me from learning further truths that could be detrimental and harmful to the emotional, fragile psyche. The vulnerable parts of me, the raw bits that feel too much might not be able to handle them until the time is right.
Yet there are other things, other interests that fuel me. I pursue them with the utmost diligence and persistence. Those are the things mentioned before, the things that have to do with my purpose and the meaning of life. What am I here to achieve? I wonder who I would be if those things no longer mattered? If I was a little more “un-gifted! Would my loved ones be hurt less, now that I am a cookie cutter version of everyone else? If I played it safe, conformed and stopped asking these all important questions!What’s so wrong with everyone else, right? Nothing really, I just believe that we all have different missions, different interests, different goals, agendas, a different purpose. It is no joke to watch a loved one get hurt, watching them in a situation that we might perceive as suffering. One where we see a solution and could remedy things on a much easier path. But perhaps this is only our perception and the suffering is really self inflicted onto ourselves. Do we know that our gifted friend, child or whoever is actually suffering? Maybe their questions fill their purpose! Perhaps it is not the gifted child that experiences these situations the same as we do, and the opinion is entirely ours. In either way it is one of those cases where I’d say “it is what it is.” It doesn’t really need an explanation of who’s opinion is right, or who is wrong and perceives things out of context. We are never able to tell how, and what someone else is experiencing even if we had that experience before ourselves. Chances are that there are differences and our feelings and emotions will never line up a 100% with someone else. We will never be at the exact same place in our journey making it an identical match. Being able to relate however, requires support, an understanding, an unconditional love, a openness and willingness to see beyond one’s own opinion and respect alternative ways and methods. Otherwise your gifted child will feel misunderstood, isolated and lonely, unable to share things with you. Most likely they will shut down, unable to count on you through the rough times.
I am a gifted child and I grew up without that support system. It’s a hard way, one with many twists and turns, many ups and downs, but eventually we find our way, with our without support. More or less painful for our loved ones to watch. Still it has to be that unique path, of the gifted, of the ones that ask the questions and it can’t be yours. They will have to find their own way of what is right for them. If you have a gifted child and your heart is breaking, perhaps this post inspires some hope. Perhaps you can count your blessings, for you have brought an extraordinary soul into this world. Embrace her/him and be their best friend. It’s the best support you can give them in this life and through the process.
Valentine’s Day, holiday and special occasion for lovers and dreaded day by those who are single, isolated and lonely. What can be said about such a day that hasn’t been said a million times!
Love is the answer and has been to many things in my life whether I had a significant other or not. Love does make the world go round, but it’s not confined to the butterflies in your stomach and being in love. Love has the ability to show in all that we do and is recognized worldwide, without a language barrier or words. Love doesn’t require words, but it requires a big heart. A willingness to add something special to every gesture, to every action, to every random act of kindness.
I am reflecting on this special day and I am taking inventory. How do I stack up so far this year? Can I name some random acts of kindness? Where are my shortcomings adding love into every day? As you celebrate this year, hug just a little tighter, kiss just a little longer and appreciate each other if you are lucky enough not to be alone. And if you enjoy your freedom as a single soul and wouldn’t have it any other way, I hope you still make love a part of your daily routine.
Whoever said that the spiritual path was easy? Spirituality doesn’t mean that you are having a quiet, nice life. That you are always in zen mode and that nothing can disturb your peace. It’s quite on the contrary and spirituality means consistently being on fire. It requires that you allow yourself to be reduced to ashes. Over and over again. Until you become the clearest and purest version of yourself and a channel for spirit. What is to die will also give way to rise. You are given this life because you are strong enough to live it.
“There is a price to be paid for every increase in consciousness. We cannot be more sensitive to pleasure without being more sensitive to pain.” ~Alan Watts
Do you find this to be true? I think it is and many old sayings step forward in my mind such as “No pain, no gain”, “Nothing is free” and the likes of those. Or how about, we gain something, we lose something.
Increased consciousness demands life experiences and it’s not the ones that we perceive as the pleasurable ones that in the end expand our consciousness. For me it has been the tough lessons, the hard ones, the ones that have halted me to take notice. It is a painful process until you learn to see each experience as a lesson and understand that even the tough times have purpose. You will then realize that everything had to be exactly this way or otherwise it wouldn’t have emerged as a profound incident. One that changed you into the next version of yourself.
Have you ever hugged a tree? Or been called a tree hugger as if it was something hard to understand, something that is not relatable, something strange, or even embarrassing? I know I have. Perhaps the idea to hug a tree has never even crossed your mind, but other than looking strange, you might be surprised to learn about a neat benefit associated with hugging a tree.
Hugging a tree increases levels of the hormone oxytocin. This hormone is responsible for feeling calm and emotional bonding. When hugging a tree, the hormones serotonin and dopamine make you feel happier. Sometimes when you hug a tree, it will hug you right back. We are all connected.
What is your story? Have you ever thought about it in detail? How would you tell it, how would it sound? You might have come across it in your purpose, trying to find the meaning of your life and what you mission is here on earth, in this life, in every day. What would your story say, how would it read? Is it an open book, or top secret, and if it is… why? Perhaps it’s personal and believe me I get it, it always somehow is, isn’t it? When it comes to our own story, it is personal and there is no way around it. Do you feel like you need to guard it, protect it’s vulnerability or do you believe that it is simply nobody’s business? What are your reasons? Are you carrying the load of your story alone, is it crushing you yet? Do you need relief? Ok, ok enough of the questions. Here is a beautiful poem from L.R. Knost to shed some light.
“Tell your story. Shout it. Write it. Whisper it if you have to. But tell it. Some won’t understand it. Some will outright reject it. But many will thank you for it. And then the most magical thing will happen. One by one, voices will start whispering, “Me too.” And your tribe will gather. And you will never feel alone again.”
For the past 6 years this blog and my story has been an open book and I have told it ever since. While I know and don’t expect everyone to understand it, I hope that for a few souls it has made a difference. Thank you for allowing me to unburden myself, to speak freely and to share the ups and downs of my life.
And I finally managed to add this long requested contact page under my menu as well as update the about me page. Still working out some kinks with the link and it’s beyond me why it doesn’t work, but the email is correct. Thank you for your patience.
Once again, the Crone is reaching me and whispers in my ear. She draws me like no other and I see her as pure beauty. I am not bothered by the wrinkles or the gray hair. The decrepitude that many see due to labels and what we are taught about age. She who has been the Maiden and the Mother and who holds infinite wisdom in her Crone years without the need and desire to proof and display it. She, who sees things that are unjust and yet chooses her battles depending on value and worth.
“When I’m a Crone, I will own my name. There won’t be room for others “haggard” projections, making me out to be a woman who has lost her sexual vitality. Or a woman who has lost her purpose because I’m no longer fertile.
When I am a Crone I will worship my body. I will bask in the sweet caresses of my beloved. And he will wash my feet, because he is in reverence of my journey.
When I am Crone I will wear the crescent moon on my forehead, because I have lived through many moons and each cycle has made me wiser. I am a High Priestess ordained by the Earth itself. My age, and the trials that have come with it, have made me powerful. My voice is needed!
When I am Crone I will lead the circle. I’ll facilitate activities to make our community stronger. I will speak my truth!
When I am Crone I will celebrate death. I will be by my friends bedsides when they transition. And I will cheer them on! As they enter the next phase of their journey.
When I am Crone I will have no fear. Because I have lived through the battles. I have moved through my insecurities. I have learned to embrace who I am and I AM who I want to be.
I am now a pillar for the community, the wise and wholly CRONE!