Posted in Inspiration, Life, My story

Goodbye February

The Cinnamon Girl and me, leaving February behind, and we are on to new adventure. The adventure of our life it seems. Here is my look back at February and I say thank you for the lessons, thank you for the struggles, and yes even thank you for the pain I had to endure during your days Mr. February. Prior sich looks and summaries are posted here.

As I was compiling my list of what worked and what didn’t, it appeared that not much was going on in February. The days mostly flew by during this short month and I don’t think I made a single journal entry into my planner to jot down something I deemed memorable. But taking a closer look, there was actually a lot that transpired. It was on a deeper level, a level not always conscious to the mind and unaware I was going through the month, side tracked by pain and the obvious. My mind was preoccupied, in survival mode so to speak, and many routine things I usually do fell to the wayside. And yet in a very short hindsight I can see what an important month February truly was.

Cinnamon had her first overnight trip and loved her adventure. It gave me a glimpse of what’s to come, and I know she will love camping, swimming in an alpine lake and new adventures. I have some work to do and fingers crossed, I’m physically able to support her adventure spirit.

Overall it was a stormy month with heavy snow fall, luckily mainly on the mountains. The storms really did a number on the health front to me, and I just couldn’t shake the pain cycle. Not long enough to gather strengths and recover fully anyways. I got small windows of pain that was lessened but it was a constant ache in varying degrees. It kept eating away at my positive outlook, luring me into a darkness I have seen before and don’t care to visit ever again.

I found much purpose in our weekly Reiki healings and never felt like I wasn’t in a good place to deliver the healing to you. Miraculously the energy always shifted when it came to our Sunday nights, allowing me to go forward in full confidence, feeling strong about the energy brought to you.

I’ve got to visit some favorite places in February, but hiking remained a painful struggle that overshadowed the experience in every step. Pain truly robs your quality of life, and if sitting still is a problem and uncomfortable, try moving and hiking. I faced a few frustrating moments, trying to carry on with business as usuals, as if nothing was wrong, like I’m a normal healthy person. I am still adjusting that business as usual looks different for me these days, and quickly I was reminded that it is wishful thinking to carry on as if nothing was wrong. My hopeful spirit was slowly dwindling, forcing a new reality.

February was not only physically challenging, but emotionally I experienced times that felt like being broken. The day could start just fine, even with reduced pain levels, but it could also could shift at a moments notice, leaving me emotionally drained and with a sadness I couldn’t assign a reason to. This intensified during the time of the full Snow moon and much energy has surfaced since then.

February and my Soul Sister brought me an important tool by Jen Peters about healing our inner wounds and inner children. I couldn’t be more thankful for the information and for not having to walk this path alone.

Any trauma experienced in our lives is stored as energy within us. From there an inner child develops, holding on to that time frame in our life and to that energy. As a defense mechanism this inner child often develops behaviors to protect the feelings associated with the trauma. Throughout our life this trauma gets triggered from time to time as we face similar experiences. Without going into the details of this process, February’s energy and the full moon, plus everything that had to happen to bring me to this point was exactly what was needed. Was it fun, no, but it was an opportunity to process these emotions and forge a plan to do the healing.

On the last of February I got to Skype with my Soul Sister, going over everything that had happened with the inner child healing in a 3 hour chat. And yeah it’s easy for us to chat away for this long. Nearly 3 years ago we ran across each other on this very blog and have never met in person. But today we dreamed of a joint venture of combining our passion for energy healing and helping other souls on their path of life. It makes me smile to see this come to fruition, to find our true calling and purpose, while working towards endless possibilities.

March Hummingbird energy brings new opportunities and I can feel the energy encouraging me to dream big. While working through trauma bonds and inner child healing, giving love and support to all versions of myself, I feel I’m standing on the brink of something great. I just have to tackle the final summit and I’m nearly there.

Author:

We are the co-creators of our life and the time is now. More than ever are we needed to support Mother Earth and each other. Together we discover and explore our unique gifts in times of strengths, in times we lean on each other, and in times when we learn from each other. This blog started as an outlet and what I ultimately called my “Warriors Journey.” It was a way to document the ups and downs of my life, sharing my hardships as well as my successes. It showcased the struggles, but more important the ways of how to overcome them. Although we are warriors each and every day, I realized that having to be a warrior, comes from a place of pain. I decided to rename this blog, and “Phoenix Rising” now stands for the story of overcoming such a painful place. My motivation for this blog hasn’t changed and I hope to share inspiration and hope, to create a sense of belonging, a space of being heard, and connecting with like minded beings who instill a sense of oneness. We are never alone, and we are unstoppable in the pursuit of what sets our soul on fire. Who I am in a nutshell... 
I am an energy healer and Reiki Master. I am surviving a chronic disease that I’ve sent into remission three times since my initial bout, 15 years ago. I continuously challenge the status quo and by doing so I change my stars. I am a believer that anything is possible. I am a hopeless romantic and I believe that true love exists on various levels. I am an optimist that will always see the glass as half full. I am a dreamer, believing in endless possibilities. Not even the sky is the limit. I have jumped off of the hamster wheel, and I am writing a new chapter. I am chasing my Nirvana to support my most authentic self. This is my story, I am that Phoenix and I am rising from the ashes. Namaste 🙏🏼💙🦋

15 thoughts on “Goodbye February

  1. A very healing month dear lady, in more ways than one. And for that, thank you for giving that weekly soul stir and place to be that is not this worlds ‘go, go, go’ for at least a little while. That in itself is self love to the heart, thank you 😀 ❤️ 🙏🏽 🦋

    Liked by 2 people

    1. It is and I think so too. Thank you Mark. As my plate fills, I recently considered pausing it for awhile which I might still have to do, but then I realized how much I myself need that time and how important it truly is to all of us. Plus I’m pretty honored to do it and to know it has had a positive effect on some of us. Much love to you my friend. 💙🦋🙏🏼

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You are right and there is a great transaction happening in my life right now. One that actually helps fill my cup, and everything that is happening is for my greater good. So I guess you could say I am doing me at the moment. 🤗💙🦋

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Your writing is beautiful. I’m so sorry there was so much pain this month for you- I hope that match brings easier days. This past month I discovered inner child healing and childhood trauma topics as well. I know that working on these will make our lives better in so many ways. I too feel the welcoming energy of March urging me to do do do . Keep going strong lady.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Awe thank you so much. Your kind words comfort me in compassion and care. February was a tough month but I believe it had to happen exactly as it did, because otherwise we wouldn’t take notice. A little less physical pain would have been still nice and this month is better 🤗.
      Sending you love and light for you important inner child work. It’s so freeing and powerful work. For me it has been a combination of shadow work, inner child healing and ancestral trauma. Each one very important.

      Liked by 1 person

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