The fire within

My weight loss journey plateaued after losing 10 lbs. It was as if my body had adjusted to my new tricks and ways of life. Being more active I was losing fat but also gained heavier muscle, which required even harder work for the pounds to come off. Still, after 10 lbs it all came to a halt.

I have to say I never particularly enjoyed working out. Maybe I never found the right work out, and a negative mind frame became the foundation of my excuses, even the perceived dizziness while working out. Maybe it was sweating profusely that I hated, but today I see it as fat crying and that something is happening towards my goals. I can see it as progress, that what I’m doing is actually working. All of a sudden it’s no longer an issue and instead it has turned into motivation. Weird how I now look forward to my workouts. 🤔

In the past I never understood how people could get addicted to working out, and today I too belong to those people chasing the feeling and the results one gets from putting in the work. It has turned into something more than just the weight coming off. Weight loss used to be my most motivating factor, but today it’s only one of the reasons and not the main one anymore. I feel better when I work out, and I ache less. It’s like my joints get an oiling and move with more ease. It’s a weapon against chronic pain and the rheumatoid arthritis.

There are still days I have to convince myself to get moving and the chronic fatigue of an autoimmune disease is not always on my side. But those days seem to be further in between now and I manage more days than none. I’m grateful for my guilty conscience that doesn’t let me rest and stays the course. There is a new found motivation, a fire within that drives me to become the best version of myself. All of a sudden everything is different. I feel I might have been here before in recent attempts and yet this time can’t be compared. This best version of myself encompasses many different aspects, from the physical to the spiritual, to the person I continue to grow into. It’s a now or never attitude, one that realizes that I’m getting older and time is getting more limited unless I live forever, which of course I’m not.

Arriving at such conclusions has become a big focus, one that finally made me put myself first. I am still getting used to the concept and it’s still new to me. Like so many, I used to always put everybody else before me, but I no longer see it as selfish. I think it is essential to maintain a happy and balanced relationship with myself so I can be of service to myself and therefore others. That doesn’t mean that those who are important in my life have taken a backseat. I think it’s the opposite and perhaps it has allowed me to care at an even deeper level.

As far as my weight loss is concerned, I’m thinking about upping my green Juice intake to two shakes a day vs. just one. My body craves it and luckily I don’t mind the taste. Maybe it can jumpstart the next wave of success and kick start the next 10 lbs. Maybe I add some weights to add definition to my physique. I have a ways to go, but I’m on my way. Further I have committed to walking at least 3 miles every day. It’s been tough with the hazardous air quality due to the wildfires, but I have not missed a day and I’m well over a week into it.

Pssst: I’ve shed another pound since originally writing this, and I’m at 11 lbs lost, so something must be working.