Posted in Chronic illness

Just because

Just because I laugh doesn’t mean I am not in pain.

Just because I have a smile on my face, doesn’t mean I’m feeling better.

Just because I choose me, doesn’t mean I’m selfish.

Just because I get frustrated and angry at my limitations, doesn’t mean I’ll give up.

Just because I cry, doesn’t not mean I’m weak.

Just because I’m judged by others, does my mean I am what they think.

Living with a chronic illness is hard and I do the best I can. I know it’s hard for you to truly understand band sadly you won’t truly get it, unless you get it.

I hope you never do….

Author:

Who am I, and why I write. I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one. I am the one, holding on to the silver lining when the skies are gray. I’m a believer that nothing is coincidence, but that everything has purpose. I’ve made my mistakes, don’t we all, but I see them as growing pains and they are a part of who I am today. I have lost myself in order to find myself, and I still do from time to time, but in a good way. I’m a big child who laughs until my belly hurts when life wants to be serious. Career wise: I’ve been there, done that, and I took “The jump” off the hamster wheel in an effort to change my future. I didn’t land all that soft, but I can say that I’m still proud to have found the courage to do it. Coming full circle, I had it all, and yet I was lonely and had nothing. Today I choose to be a collector of moments and I chase memories, instead of the material stuff. Less is more, and the motto is quality over quantity. You’d be amazed at how freeing it can be. I see myself as a free spirit that believes in an unconventional lifestyle. Somehow I go against the grain most of the times, not to rebel, but because it feels right to stay true to my unique and authentic self. It takes courage, and you often stand alone, but if you dare, you soon realize that it is the only way if you don’t want to lose who you are. Just like most, my past wasn’t easy and I come from a life that didn’t always give me the opportunity to be heard. Few related and even fewer cared to take the time. But that’s the past and it’s history, the future hasn’t happened and the “NOW” is truly all we ever have. In the end we all have a story to tell, and we all seek to be understood. We all yearn to be heard and accepted and still life is hard and our path is full of stumbling blocks. If we can see the lessons in adversity we may realize that the toughest moments are often our greatest teachers. There is a reason for the saying that the stars can’t shine without darkness, and it might be darkness that will show you the light.
It took a series of (un)fortunate events, to learn to glow through the pain, to learn how to dance in the rain. I believe in Magic and wonder, and the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. As an empath this old soul often feels a little too much, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Today, I am here to tell my story because I believe that it can help others. It is my hope to bring inspiration and strengths to you, while showing you that it can be done. I know you are out there, and I know you are suffering in silence. I am here to tell you that you are not alone, and your voice is being heard loud and clear. Hang on and be strong, transformation is yours. 
In light and love....Rhapsody Bohème 💙🦋

18 thoughts on “Just because

  1. I relate to this so much…and I know I don’t understand or feel exactly what you do, but I’ve had chronic health issues that have bounced around in my body and doctors for much of my life-and it can be a truly isolating and devastating experience (especially when there’s flares and people can’t “see” what’s wrong and can be dismissive-even if not intentional it hurts because I’ve beaten myself up so much over the years to just “be better” and all that meant was “hide it better”)…I don’t usually speak to these things but I love reading your words, and care about you-and just wanted to say in whatever way I can be alongside your pain…you’re not alone 🙂 and Johnny sends a cat hug ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ashley, I can’t even begin to tell you how much your comment means. It warms my heart and I thank you from the bottom of it for your kind words. Hugs.
      In truth, I am glad you don’t actually understand these symptoms, as I also care much about you and don’t want you to experience these pains. I truly hope you are well now and don’t beat yourself up anymore. It’s a tough road but having people like you in your side makes all the difference. Thank you for walking right besides me and for being wonderful you. And Johnny too. Purrrfect. Much love to you my friend. ❤️

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I hear you, dear Rhapsody ❤
    Anyone, who lives with chronic illness, will understand what you are writing about. Specially the invisible kind, which are often not or bad understood. Chronic illness drain the energy and leave souls without much left, when the flares are up.
    Much love and healing your way, dear friend ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  3. It is so hard to live with pain and fatigue that nobody can see. My body is strong when it’s feeling well, but nobody can see the weakness when hit with a flare. It’s almost impossible to explain the overwhelming fatigue when it hits.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Amen sister, I know, same here. It’s a struggle and fight each day, as we never quite know what we are getting, but I guess it’s one reason we are warriors. Much love to you dear warrior queen. Hugs ❤️

      Like

    1. Hugs. Thank you, and it was your comment making me tear up. How sweet and extraordinary of you to do this for me. It means so much and I am so touched. Thank you kindly my friend.
      Oh and yes it is a round pizza towels, one of my favorites and loves. 😉 There is another post scheduled where you will get a bigger glimpse of it soon hehehe.
      Have a wonderful weekend and much love to you.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh it is and a little weather doesn’t discourage me. As a matter of fact one of my passions is photography and I often say “No weather no shot.” However the barometric pressure can be a different story sometimes when dealing with the RA but I always do my best to dance in the rain and make the best out of every situation. Thank you my friend 😉

      Liked by 1 person

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