Life is bittersweet, and never did I realize this saying to be more true, then during my stay in Germany. I will be leaving next month, but a part of me stays while the rest of me worries as I’m gone.
Never was I more afraid to leave and honestly, I don’t know how I ever did it in all these years, leaving Mom behind. Never has life been so apparent in all it’s harsh realities. Never was the truth so cold and the obvious between want and reality so clear.
Never have I felt more lonely and isolated, more overwhelmed and more pushed into the corner with my hands tied. Never have I been more vulnerable and scared, more devastated and yet hopeful. Never did I have to be stronger and more of a fighter as I have been for the past ten month.
Never have I starred depression more into the eye as I have been. Never did I feel more like giving up as I have been here. Never did I feel such agonizing pain, both physically and mentally. Never did I cry as much as I have cried during my time in Germany.
Never have I stumbled this much and fallen so many times, but always have I made the choice to get back up and face another day and another fight.
Cry me a river…..