Indian Paintbrush

Indian Paintbrush is one of the many wildflowers encountered on the way to Winnemucca Lake. This one has a special meaning to me as it ties together a few passions dear to my heart. 

I love wildflowers and really anything that has to do with the wild.

I relate in many ways to the Native American wisdom and on some days I wear a war bonnet for its symbolic meaning in regards to my journey.

Lastly, I’m artistic and love to paint. So the name of this beautiful vibrant wildflower brings it all together for me and helps me be still. Here is a closer look and isn’t she gorgeous?

Take time and smell the flowers….

Pony update

Thank you all for keeping your fingers crossed about “The Pony” and your inquiries. I don’t have her back yet and she is spending one more night, but I did the little “ungrateful fuel pump” injustice and it is working just fine. After all it decided to continue to work and my fingers are crossed she can forgive me for initially blaming her and calling her ungrateful haha. Problem is some other matters are still present and need to be addressed before I take “The Pony” home and I hope to know more tomorrow. 

In the meantime here is a picture of Mother Nature’s beautiful spectacle from a week ago. I hope you enjoy it. XO 💙🦋

PS. The human billboard already worked today and got my new mechanic my first referral. 

Car trouble

I was going to do what with my two days off? Pack and get caught up on a few things? Write some emails, do some shopping? Pffft. Maybe some other time and car trouble has replaced my previous plans. I really can’t complain but it is the timing of it all. My little escapade starts out with my 2004 Ford Mustang GT, an anniversary edition that is also otherwise referred to as “My Pony”. I always wanted a real pony as a child but it never so happened and even in my adult life the opportunity never came around. Of course today, I would know that opportunities don’t always fall into our lap and that often times it is up to us to make things happen. I partially did so in later years and bought me a “Steel Pony.” It’s more than a means of getting back and forth, a necessity and an object to me. Oh no Sir, I do have a special connection with “The Pony” and together we often ride like the wind. At almost 169K miles, she is not the youngest, but never has given me any trouble. Until two weeks ago when it all started by making a sharp right turn and “The Pony” just stalled. The engine turned off as if I had turned the key and I was left with no power steering and no power breaks. A scary moment but luckily I was going slow enough to stay somewhat in control. “What the….(fill in the blank) was my initial thought after the scare. I quickly turned my flashers on to signal the car behind me that this was not my usual driving style. Luckily the car started and I drove home the rest of the way without problems. Checking under the hood, nothing was obvious and I would keep an eye on it over the next few days and perhaps even have it checked sometimes when good ole “Time” would throw me some extra hours to actually make it happen. 

I have to say that I was uneasy driving it as I kept my distance to other cars, trying to be prepared for another stalling episode. Nothing, for nearly two weeks until Monday evening driving home from work. “The Pony” drove normal and we were “One” flying up the hill at 70+ mph, going strong over the crest and hitting the off ramp at a decent speed of probably still 50 mph. It’s a pretty long, straight one with plenty of room to slow down and I had forgotten all about the little problem from two weeks ago. Nobody was in sight or in front of me and luckily I had passed them all. Foot of the gas, the battery light and check engine soon light came on and it was lights out at 50 mph. I was lucky it was straight and that I was able to start the car while driving to regain power of the steering and the brakes. It stalled a second time just before the garage and I knew it was no longer something I could ignore and put off. 

My day off today started at 5:30AM, so I could drive the car to town and drop it off with a mechanic of who I have never met. He seems to know right away what it is and I can’t say when the last time was that the fuel filter was replaced. Who knew this should be done annually! I know a lot about cars and even worked in some before, how could I have missed that!!! We find a disconnected intake hose and indeed the fuel filter is clogged solid. It’s a miracle anything still passed through it. He says, I’m on borrowed time and most likely the fuel pump will go as well due to having to work so hard for God knows how long. Now that the filter situation is fixed and it won’t have to work as hard anymore, it might as well just give up all together. What? Shouldn’t it feel grateful not having to work so hard anymore? Ungrateful little fuel pump!!! I pick up the car and I’m beyond impressed with the mechanic that I connected with immediately by sharing a passion for other Metal Ponies”. A merely $58 and he even sends me out to drive it before I pay to see if I can tell a difference. And WOW, there is a difference as she flies with ease (and I am barely tapping the gas) across the pavement. He said that due to the clogged fuel filter “The Pony” was starving and ran very lean, had horrible gas mileage and had to work very hard to get me back and forth. Putting in premium gas even though it’s not required and filling the tank when it gets down to a quarter, most likely has saved me from more serious engine damage. I did something good without even realizing it but the fault of this in the first place and not replacing the fuel filter annually, is all mine. Oh well, if this is the worst that has happened over the passed thirteen years of having “The Pony” I’m very lucky indeed. However, I do need a tune up, a gasket replaced and new tires which will roughly set me back at least 1K. It’s normal wear and tear though and no fault of “The Pony.” 

He (the mechanic/owner) smiles and is ecstatic to have made my day, and being in a position to help me. I almost want to leave extra money because I’m so relieved and grateful, feeling I got away with a steal. I profusely thank him and his wife and vow to tell everybody I come in contact with about his amazing business and the outstanding service that I have received. Word of mouth is my promise to both and I mean it. I will be a walking billboard of free advertising as I am sold and hooked forever on this shop and it’s caring people. I’m even looking forward to dumping more money into “The Pony”. It’s been taking care of me and I have to return the favor and take care of it. I feel good and know that when the time comes, it will be in very capable and caring hands. I drive off, feeling awesome and she runs great. Three miles later, she stalls. OH NO….it was almost too good to be true, wasn’t it, must have been my initial thought. I quickly decide to drive back to the shop and within a six mile round trip, she stalls six times. I’m not sure what is going on yet and “The Pony” will have to stay there overnight, but as expected, it looks like the fuel pump has decided that she doesn’t want an easier job and has thrown in the towel. Uggghhhh. Fingers crossed, I get her back tomorrow and the problem is solved for now while not costing me an arm and a leg before Germany.

To kill time while waiting for “The Pony” none of my chores got done. Instead I had breakfast at the Black Bear Diner, checked out some new Altra hiking shoes, was on the hunt for knee high hiking socks which I didn’t find, went to two other retailers and even played the slot machines which happens every blue moon. I won $10 whoohoo which paid for my Arnika gel (for the arthritis) and my day at 7PM is far from being over as I will have to drive back into town at 11PM. Nevertheless, my fingers will remain crossed and I know all will be ok. 

Total Eclipse of the Heart

With the solar eclipse yesterday and a wonderful personal message from my dear fairy sister Roda, I felt poetic and wrote a little poem that I would like to dedicate to her. Before I start gushing my feelings, I hope you already know her name well, but just in case you haven’t stopped by her blog….yet….what….why not…please make sure you do and be prepared to be emerged in love and kindness. She is one of a kind, a person that has touched my heart too numerous times to keep track. She has also managed to move me to tears of joy over the past couple of weeks. Not once, but several times. At first I thought that I might have turned into an emotional mess, but secondly, I realized that it was her kindness and going out of her way, her thinking of me and surprising me in a variety of ways, that made me feel special and what touched me so deeply. Roda has nominated me for several awards, of which I fell short of answering some. In the end I hope I always find a way to show my appreciation for those kind thoughts and give back proper credit and love in return.

Awhile ago, Roda sent me a book, a book for women, women on their journey of enlightenment and realization. It was a book that confirmed what I already knew, but it was also a book that gave me the reassurance that I was not alone. It’s kind of neat to read and recognize the things you have encountered yourself, even though every journey is very unique and personal. Along the way you also find a common threat that binds all those beautiful spirits together as one. I wasn’t going crazy just yet, and in all actuality I never really believed that I was. I think it’s normal to find yourself alone sometimes as these things are hard to explain and to relate to from others who are still asleep. 

Roda and I connected long before the book arrived and I often have to smile when I wander over to her blog. I’m reminded of how similar we are in our beliefs, our love for the simple things and the beauty that is all around and perhaps even in our journey of having experienced similar catalysts. There is an intuition that is guided and she is magically gifted to drop in whenever I need it the most, whether I know it or not. And often I don’t know until a act of kindness reaches me and allows the tears to fall freely in the most grateful and humbling of ways. Bits and pieces from the poem I wrote are inspired from Roda’s message “Total eclipse of the heart” and the book she has sent me. 

Last Thursday morning, prior to a day out hiking, I saw a notification from Roda asking if a little magic had arrived. Full of excitement, eyes big and heart pounding like a little excited child, getting a surprise for the first time, I drove to the mailbox on my way into town. There I found a beautiful hand written card and everything was perfect before I even got to open it. From the cute flower stationary, to the ornate hand writing in calligraphy style, to the stamps of an airplane writing the word “Love” into the sky, I sat for a moment and held it in my hands as if it was the biggest treasure in a long time. And in that moment it was. I finally opened it and it was perfect once more as it read….

” All you need is faith, trust, and a little bit of pixie dust.” 

How perfect is that? I was touched beyond means and felt that she always understands me and my journey, even when words are absent or I haven’t really said much. There is a knowing without words, a respect for the journey and a special kind of bond. Roda took the initiative to draw my first oracle card which was “Metamorphosis” and the rest is really history. I feel that it was a spiritual act, a chance to connect on yet a deeper level. The wonderful mail accompanied me on my hike that day (and actually I had it with me for several days). It still is in plain sight and I see it every day as I smile and bit my dear fairy sister a beautiful day. Later on, card in hand, I read it aloud to another special friend I just had to share this treasure with. Only this time I could not finish without becoming very emotional and choking on my words. There was a release of some sort and the pain began to fall off. I realized how long I was required to have been so strong. How long I had fought to protect my heart. How long I endured deceit and insincerities, while all I ever hoped, was to contribute and find a way to be accepted. Even though I have achieved this milestone, life hasn’t always made it easy and at times it almost distorted my beliefs in humanity. I had come to accept that it was this way, almost as if I was undeserving of more. I know it sounds a bit like a self pity party, but that is not the intend as I never complained through the process of it all and I never gave up. Today I even believe that it was all necessary for my growth and that even the pain has a place throughout the journey. 

Roda’s kindness took me by surprise and released the so said pain of which I didn’t even realized that it was still tucked away somewhere deep inside. I’m not sure if there is more left, more that will come out another time, but my heart feels lighter. I continue to move forward, for myself and in the hope to show others who are struggling that anything is possible. I felt grateful and blessed by this random act of kindness and being bestowed such a wonderful gift. This blog has put me in touch with many wonderful people and I do know that kindness exists out there. You show me every day with your interest and feedback, through the bonds we have built and I’m forever grateful for YOU. Roda’s card was a gift to send me off to Germany and to wish me well with the toughness of everything that lies ahead. It was the kind thought and taking the time out of her own life to make someone else’s day that was worth more than it’s weight in gold to me. 

And then came yesterday, and a wonderful recorded message from Roda who believes we might have been woodland fairies in a prior life. She took the time to sent a personal thought and a surprise that stopped me once more in my tracks. I had just arrived at work as I listened to her video voice memo. Again I got emotional and a second release followed. Life is not always easy and sometimes it is complex. Sometimes we need a little help and a little nudge to keep us pushing forward and I could never put into words what these gestures have meant to me. They serve as a reminder that we all have the ability to do something special. For someone or something, and that we should do it more often. It often doesn’t take money or much effort, and even when time is scarce, all that truly is required, is for it to be important enough, and we will always find a way to prioritize what should matter the most. Thank you Roda for making me feel that I matter and for always being there. I could never thank you enough and you are truly one in a million.

Total Eclipse of the Heart (dedicated to my special Fairy sister Roda)

I trust my own darkness to reveal my truth.

To allow it to force me to pause and find my own matter in the grand scheme. 

To embrace the pain it might bring in times of darkness and to be patient as it gives way to the light that surely will follow.

I trust my own darkness to show me the way, to let it guide me without resistance and banish the mundane.

To look forward to the messages that it holds, and to feel excitement for the signs that confirm the right path for me.

I trust my own darkness to stretch me in ways sometimes unimaginable, to show me the lessons when I can’t see what’s next and to fill my heart with wonder and believe. Always….

I trust my own darkness…

Photo Credit: Unknown/Google and one of few pictures that are not my own.

Red Dragonfly

It’s been the summer of Dragonflies, a magical time of Fairy realms, change, transformation and adaptability. Dragonfly has invited me to dive deeper into the realm of emotions and feelings. To be on the lookout for false illusions and deceit and be prepared to see through the veil of what is not always clear. Dragonfly has been a constant companion during this year’s outings and I don’t remember ever seeing so many. Unexpectedly, they have appeared in the most of unusual places, such as the parking lot at work, sitting on an antenna ball, swarming shallow water crossings in high numbers, they have landed on my arm, unafraid or bothered by my human presence or flew around me while swimming in an alpine lake. 

The majority has been blue in color with a few brown ones, but that was about to change as the other day, I had the pleasure of having a red one land on a tiny branch right next to me. There it sat, keeping me company, while together we admired the glistening lake as a back drop right in front of us. Dragonfly, a tiny, whimsy reminder and messenger of everything that lies ahead and what is yet to come. The signs have bee amazing and without resistance but full of wonder, I value the guidance they have provided for me.  

Spot the deer, dear…

This picture was taken last week during what I call the magical hour. Dusk was setting in and I stayed out late to watch the sunset falling over Gold Lake. One of my little friends came out of the woods to visit and hang out with us for quite some time. Unbothered by our presence he roamed right behind us and in close proximity, looking up ever so often when a unfamiliar noise reached his ears. He never got spooked and eventually walked off into the sunset. It is always moments like these that remain with me in the end. They might not be much to most, but everything to me and I’m grateful to be allowed to be a part of them. I believe that our spirits connect in many different forms and shapes and this was definitely one of those moments. 

PRAYING with MANTIS

It’s been awhile that I wrote what I would consider a real post. Life has been busy, busier than usual but the experiences have been nothing short of happening in this period of personal growth in my journey. 

Another funny happened to me the other day and I’m thinking about submitting the story to my friend Linda at mainepaperpusher.wordpress.com for her guest in jest series. She loves a good laugh and who could not use a little extra humor in their life. I hope to reach my goal to lift her recent tough days and scares just a little while bringing a smile to her face. If you haven’t stopped at her site, please take a moment to do so and be prepared to laugh and find sass around every corner. 

Anyways back to my story. It’s about 7:30 AM the other day as I arrive at work. The parking lot is empty for the most part with only a few random cars from other employees. It’s still early, before store opening and the world is quiet from all the hustle and bustle of retail life that is about to begin. I sit for a moment and as usual I’m fashionably early by about 30 minutes. What used to be calculated to the minute in younger years with not a moment to spare, has turned into easing into the day and putting the rush on a back burner whenever possible. A random woman is walking the parking lot. Her hair is sticking up wildly and appears non groomed. Her clothing old and dirty, I watch her for a couple of minutes and conclude that she might be homeless. She lingers around the area and takes another stroll through the lot. It’s time to go inside I decide as I grab my purse and lunch pail. A few steps away from my car, something on the ground catches my eyes. It appears straw like and the color contrast against the dark asphalt was hard to miss. Perhaps a twig of some sort, but somehow it commands me to look closer. Wow, well “Hello there dear Praying Mantis”, I almost mistakingly took you for a stick. Luckily I missed you and didn’t run you over with the car. I forget about everything around me as I try to snap a quick picture with my phone. The top view doesn’t do it any justice and I’m not happy with the result. I know that I have to get down low if I want to capture anything worthwhile. Purse and lunch pail aside I’m now on my knees in the empty parking lot in front of this Praying Mantis that can’t be seen from a few feet away from me. A picture that would even had the wild haired homeless woman wonder and raise an eyebrow in good old “What the heck” fashion. I don’t care and frankly I forgot all about her even being there. She is somewhere close by and all I know is that she could be standing right next to me, this very moment. I’m focused (literally and all pun is fully intended) on my little unusual friend. On my knees, upper body extended forward my hair is on the ground and I’m inches from the dirty pavement. I finally get my picture and I’m happy with the new and improved version of the prior picture. Back at my feet, I see the woman weirdly stare at me from a distance and I realize that she was still there, obviously watching the whole thing. She is now hanging out at the front door of which I have to enter, waiting for me as I appear to busy myself on the phone reviewing the pictures I just took. She waits, unwavering, inquisitive look on her face and all and a confrontation with her is unavoidable. Within a few feet from her, she decides to meet me half way and begins walking towards me. I prepare to give her some money for a warm meal but instead she has another type of question for me. She grabs my arm, bewildered with a look of seeking to understand what just happened in front of her eyes. What weird thing possessed me to hit the ground, arms extended in front of me facing south she is curious. “Where you Praying out there?” she asks my with the most serious look on her face. Now it’s my turn to sport the bewildered look as all I can muster to say with a short laugh was “Well yes, I was PRAYING with MANTIS. I’m sure she didn’t understand what I was talking about, but the picture and this incident became the joke of the day and even now is still a funny one to tell. 
So, here is the picture I did capture of my friend “Mantis” and I hope you enjoy the story and it brings a smile. Xo 🦋💙

As a spirit animal, Praying Mantis brings the blessings of stillness, intention, attainment, fulfillment and satisfaction. 

In a symbolic meaning  it will bring the magic of evolution, hypnotism and spiritual perception. 

Not at all strange to see this beautiful sign from the universe at this point of my journey. 

An Intention/Prayer for the Broken-Hearted

What a powerful message from my dear friend Shelly and I fell in love with her words. Thank you for the compassion and taking a moment to be in tune with your surroundings and the needs and struggles of others. After all, we all find ourselves in moments we can use some extra love from time to time. Make spreading joy a fulltime habit.

Love is Stronger

Over the years, I have been helped tremendously by intentions or prayers that other people have written. Lately, I have been writing my own. This is an intention/prayer I wrote for the broken-hearted. If you believe in God, you can use this as a prayer. If you do not believe in God, you can use this as an intention and say something like “May the broken-hearted be surrounded by comfort and healed from violence, oppression, etc” or “May I be surrounded by comfort and healed from violence, oppression, etc.”

View original post

Princesses and Warriors

“Why grow up a Princess? When you can be a Warrior! 

-Rhapsody Bohėme….Keep fighting 🦋

Wild Spirit…🦋

“Her messy hair is a visible attribute of her stubborn spirit.
As she shakes it free, she smiles knowing wild is her favorite color.”

-J. Iron Word