Fade to grey

My hair has grown out. It is revealing some major grey streaks and roots which are worse in some areas than others. Weird how it introduces itself so uneven, a streak here and a blotch there, oh and wait, I think there is some more in the back somewhere buried underneath the hair on top. It’s been like that for quite some time and I don’t even remember when the first grey surfaced. I have always colored it.On a few occasions I’ve contemplated to just let it be and embrace the grey, but I always touched it back up and covered the hard earned silver strands. Maybe subconsciously I bought into the hype of what social media tells us, giving us the feel that a woman is considered old when her hair turns grey. Maybe this bothered me on some level not recognized and I wasn’t ready to be considered old. It doesn’t really matter as to why I did or did not ever follow through. I remember back to Germany as I was a teenager. I don’t know in which context anymore but I was thinking that some of my aunts in there late thirties or early forties were so old, so many years away from me in age. It’s funny to think of it now and I have passed the age I considered them old some time ago. I guess I have joined their ranks and what’s left is that time flew by. My nieces and nephews back home must think I’m older then dirt as I’m sure the cycle repeats with their own similar thoughts. Ha… Or is this truly a gender thing that we feel extra pressured to uphold a certain image. It doesn’t seem to apply to our gentlemen who are considered sophisticated and handsome flashing their attractive grey. Where is the fairness here you might ask? Could it be that we are creating that pressure all by ourselves?

With the pictures and images gracing our magazines, and the models portraying the ideal look of a woman, the average woman feels pressured to fit those images to gain acceptance and avoid being otherwise labeled in a negative, derogatory way. Even without verbalization, a look can say a thousand words and perhaps it is the very reason as to why we feel compelled to “comply”. Sadly we are judged without ever speaking a word and it is no wonder so many feel the need to do what they can in an effort to lower, perhaps eliminate that initial false perception. It’s not only size and weight, but the overall image, the choice of our clothing and if we keep up with the latest trends, hair included. We sacrifice and do things to ourselves, with little self regard so we can fit in, even if that means absorbing toxic chemicals through our skin and scalp. Nothing is going to happen right? Not to us, or will it? 

Over the past few weeks I have gone back and forth, “Should I color or not”. I might have actually done it a few times already but I never prioritized it. Spending my time writing or doing other things kept me from actually spending the time on my hair and therefore the grey has remained. I already have the color and all I had to do is to follow up on that famous quote and “Just do it”. And then I came across another post from my friend Colin again, who inspired me once more about a different perspective when it comes to the grey matter. He posted two pictures and two quotes (God knows I’m a sucker for both) that spoke to me. I continue to marvel in amazement of how these signs and messages appear and seem to answer my questions or guide me onto the path that ultimately feels right for me. His post resolved the mystery question and I feel it revealed the fitting answer for me. Perhaps that could change but I feel pretty strongly about it and it has stuck with me for days now. 

You see things don’t always have to be black and white which I credit to our need for control and always being prepared. To calling the shots and to eliminate surprises and potential embarrassment. The fear of judgement. But if we can sway just a little from it, we might realize that there is much freedom hiding between the grays. It’s a place in between the black and white, a place where life is happening and alive is how I want to feel. Wouldn’t it be nice to enjoy your life with a little less pressure? Plus it is the favorite color of a favorite person, so how wrong could it be….

I think I have come to the conclusion to let the grey be and to wear it proudly. I no longer will pull them out and I think I will actually boost their appearance a little and naturally lighten my hair today. Let’s see what chamomile tea with lemon can do and I hope it can make the appearance a little more even and less patchy. Summer is around the corner and a beachy wave look sounds like a plan right now. Pssst…I have a five day adventure coming up next week and the beach it is, this time. 😉 

I don’t feel that the grey will make me look older and I think it also depends on how you style your hair. Maybe some won’t agree with me and would deem me and grey hair OLD lol. Its ok and I appreciate our differences and our varied opinions, but in the end we should choose for ourselves. Much time has passed since I lived my life for society and these days my time is spent strengthening and feeding my own, beautiful, unique person. I don’t want to be beautiful like society, I want to be beautiful like me. In my book, we are all beautiful in our own ways and we all contribute in our own special, unique way. How you feel about yourself should be enough to make all the difference, for it is the only thing that truly matters. You have to live YOUR life and not the life of others. Only you can set yourself free and your happiness depends on no one but yourself. Find your own unique gift and be the inspiration and the change that motivates others to become free. I guess it can be as simple as letting your grey hair shine through and eliminating the pressure to fit in.

I found this picture online and call me crazy but I think that the grey is actually sexy. Somehow it is sending me visions of wizardry and magic and I think I might actually be able to pull it off. I think that even with grey hair I can still be a sassy grey fox that is far from the typical stigma of being old. And who cares if I am, I’m forever young at heart and nothing but a big kid. 

What are your thoughts on this ladies and gentlemen, yay, nay? How do you feel about it and have you considered what your choice will be when the time comes? Or what are your reasons for coloring?