A few minutes have passed as I find myself sitting here, staring at the white screen. The dialogue doesn’t flow easily and while I want to write, I feel a loss for the words that don’t seem to come across my lips and instead it is silence that is embracing me.
I went to bed with another heavy heart, knowing that life changed once more. The world as we know it was no more, but would bring more changes to adapt to, more for some and less for others who are not that close. I didn’t sleep all that well. We lost a loved one yesterday, a husband, a father, brother, uncle and friend. He was not one of my immediate family members by blood, but a family member in spirit and to someone close to me. I recall moments spent together and I’m lucky to have known this wonderful man. I’m not going to say much about it, other than my heart and prayers are with the family during this tough time, that they may find peace and strength for the days ahead. To feel consoled in knowing that that the suffering is over, a better place awaits and that one day we will meet again. Until that day comes, he remains and lives within our hearts….RIP.
I feel the push and the constant pull of the universe, trying to guide and show me the way for my own future. Far too many things have happened recently, making it impossible to ignore and dismiss the signs occuring almost daily. I’m reminded that “Life is short”, that we have to “Play hard” to win and that without “Pain there is no gain”. I feel as if I have been sitting on the sidelines, watching my life pass me in a daze. With one thing for certain and I haven’t been an active player who is in charge or takes action. “What’s meant to be, will be” somehow no longer serves my purpose as I’m starting to get into the game and take a few steps for change and a life that is more fulfilled and in line with my higher self. Sometimes even the universe needs a little jump start as it may show us the way but the actual “Doing it” and “Making it happen” part is up to us. I can’t say that I’m playing hard just yet, but I have taken a few swings and it feels good. I feel empowered and strong, in charge of my destiny and I feel I am the director of my journey. Nobody else anymore.
Whether I’m pep talking myself or whatever else might be going on, today I step up to the plate and resist much when it comes to how my story is going to end. I have a voice to use if it differs in any way from the fairytale that lives within me. I might be small, insignificant and powerless in the grand scheme of what will be, I might have little control when it comes to the bigger influences and perhaps I’m rendered powerless, but I’m trying. I believe in the silver lining and the happy ending.
Life is short – Play hard and resist much (Fight)
I think I will try to call my Mom before work today and see if I can get her to pick up the phone. She has been on my mind.
Screenshot from VNV Nation “Beloved”
Rhapsody Bohème 
What can I say when I read this post? I mean I am lost for words to tell you in the sense of what your feeling at this time. I know I am not here to fix anything and I do know that your spirit is strong in everything you do in this life. And it touches more than this blog here let me tell you. I am proud to have you as a friend and a damn good one for sure. People don’t come in our lives for luck, they come into it for a reason, and I am glad that you are in mine, but I hope that you can find sense in this time of darkness and talk to your mother and hope that you can find a sense of peace soon. All I can say in the end that, I am walking next to you in the sense of being that crane, and you being a tiger in spirit means that we will have great things to talk about on our walk down this path. I again am throwing some strength at you, and feel the warmth of my wings around your fur this evening. Stay strong tiger… For we both need each other in the end… Your friend, white crane…
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Hello my beautiful crane, thank you for taking the time and your kind words. You touch my heart and I feel your care and understanding. It means everything but the most important thing you can do for me is to get well and keep your strength to fight. You know I’m ok, I’m strong being that I am that tiger, sometimes I just get tired of always having to be strong but I am not complaining.
I got used to this way of life, but lately don’t want to sit on the sidelines anymore. I believe that we have to chase our dreams and sometimes we just can’t be so passive as I have been.
You are right people enter our lives for a reason and it is no coincidence. I am too proud to call you my friend and I’m grateful our paths have crossed. Thank you for putting your feathery wing around my fur and walking besides me this evening and always. The picture of it makes me smile and perhaps I should make a painting out of it. Rest up and get well my friend white crane…😉
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I think it would be an amazing image of us with my wings around you giving you that hug of strength my tiger friend. And resting is what I’m about to do. And I’m glad that your heart was touched my my gentle wings this evening…
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It definitely was, thank you 😉. And you are probably right and you won’t see a crane walking a tiger just any day haha. See, I am harmless and nothing but a big cuddly cat. Rest up….catch you soon. Xoxoxo hugs
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Well that is the amazing part of what I study in the martial arts is that your right why would you see a tiger and a crane hanging out together, but then why wouldn’t you? I mean we all have to share this space that we live on. In the end of this lesson I just know that your warm cuddly fur isn’t just for this crane, but it’s for the world in where you live and want to share it with. That too me is powerful and will show people that if animals can co-exist why can’t us humans being doing the same thing in the sense of showing love where it’s really needed in people’s lives. So again it was nice to walk down this path with you my cuddly cat, and just keep an opened mind for our next walk soon. You never know what we will encounter next to join us on the journey… hugs and this crane gives you a soft kiss on your forehead and retires for the evening…
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Powerful words as they remind me of “The power of one”
We each can make a difference and all of us can inspire and influence a change.
I have always loved to indulge in the unexpected I guess. Not to rebel or go against the grain (which is often the result) but rather to stay true to myself even if it’s not the popular choice. So “why not” seems to fit me perfectly.
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I’m reading this, and thinking, no, what will be will be doesn’t let us feel the power and be the warrior in our lives, we need to understand where our power is, and yet also understand that we do not have control over everything in our lives. I think my power lies in knowing what I need and what I’m called to do and working hard to follow that path, but also being willing to accept the things I cannot change and meeting the challenges that the things I cannot change creates.
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Hi Patty, it’s so nice to see you and you know I value your input. I agree that some things can’t be changed and I’m really ok with it. I have always let things unfold as they wanted too, but perhaps a little too much, too much on the passive side instead of taking ownership and more charge of my own dreams. I’m no control freak and again I’m too laid back at times.
I am a warrior and the time has come to take charge, for my health, my life, my happiness. It’s not a bad thing and quiet the opposite. I just have a new perspective and dreams I’m not just willing yet to let the cobwebs settle on.
Hugs xoxoxo
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