Posted in Buddhism, Experience, Inspiration, Life, Motivation,, My story, Purpose driven, Self help, Spiritual awakening, Survival

Negativity – The emotional vampire

Another thing that I had to learn and what was standing in the way of playing well with others was that I had no interest in the negativity that was derived from that “gossip wagon”. Everybody was entitled to their own opinion and I full heartily believed in that, but it was the negative view and the negativity itself that sucked the life right out of me. I felt a great dislike, a discomfort and a disturbance if you will, whenever I was around those vibes. I knew right away that this wasn’t my cup of tea.

Have you ever noticed the emotional little vampires that buzz around you every day? Ever heard the saying that “Attitude is contagious”? I truly believed in it, but chose not to adapt to the same attitude or to become a negative mind in the process. Not if I could help it, even though I couldn’t deny that being around those complaining, always seemingly unhappy people was definitely affecting my own vibe. I could feel it wanting to rub off on me and I despised it. I knew that there was nothing to gain and it was always the same outcome. I wondered if something was ever resolved from that method but I guess I would have had to stick around to find out. I saw the same groups of people, huddling with new toxic subjects of negativity, filling the daily gripe in rallying each other up. The negative little vampires seemed to have an opinion about everything and knew everything better than everyone else on top of it.

Eventually I started to avoid their company. I could no longer bestow the doubt of them just having a bad day and it turned out to be an ongoing series of only bad days. We all have bad days, perhaps when things don’t turn out as expected or if life throws us a curve ball. But come on….every day!!! It was the same, day in and day out and it was mind boggling how much effort was directed towards being so negative. There was never a glimmer of hope, never a possibility for the positive, just a negative view of everything and anything that was on today’s menu. I wondered how amazing it would be if all that energy was directed into their jobs, but then this would be an entirely different chapter, wouldn’t it?

The gap of becoming an outsider widened. I couldn’t relate with the emotional vampires and they couldn’t relate with me. I was strange and different and what we learned so far is that I didn’t like to gossip and that I didn’t like to feed into negativity. By nature I am an optimist at heart but in short I was lacking interpersonal savvy and “I didn’t play well with other’s”. Perhaps interpersonal skills and playing well with others required to be tolerant or even join the gossip of being negative. I didn’t know and I didn’t waste much time with it. If that was the case, it would require me to change and I didn’t want to change for the acceptance to fit in.

I felt drained from their behavior and while life was not excluding me, I had my own share of negative experiences. I saw little resolution in choosing the negative approach. What was I to gain from literally chanting louder and louder, bitching about my situation and letting everybody know how much it sucked and how displeased I was? Would it miraculously change and fix itself? Maybe I would get temporary relief of getting it all out there and getting it off of my chest. In parts I believed that it would be healthy to not harbor negative feelings inside and to hold on to anger and frustration. I don’t know, maybe I should try it, but I didn’t like the way it made me feel. Feeling my blood pressure rise, I associated this behavior with bitterness, hate and great dislike. That doesn’t mean that I smiled at a lousy situation that was happening to me or that I even liked it, but I looked at it more like a lesson. For sure there was something to take away from it, something that was to be learned. And I knew that many of the most important lessons we learn are born out of hardship and adversity. Bad things happen to everybody and nobody is exempt, but how we react and what we take away from these situations is up to us. I found it to be much healthier for myself to uphold and focus on my inner peace and not to disturb that balance, but once again it only caused others to abstain from relating to me.

I became stranger by the minute. At least in their eyes….

And then I came across this quote and all made sense once again. I was still on my way and I was coming home to myself.

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Author:

I'm a dreamer and hopeless romantic who believes that there is always a silver lining to everything. Now, inspired by the simple life, I have learned that less is more and that we find magic all around us if we take the time to notice. Life is a journey and a process that is ever changing. We are constantly evolving in the matter of who we are as we align our stars and shed a past no longer in line with our highest self. I don't easily fit conventional norms, not because I'm a rebel, but because of resenting the pull that threatens to take me away from my true beliefs and my unique personal identity. I support the power of "Choice" and the ability for us to be the architects of our own lives. Some of these choices should have something a little wild about them as they form the moments that forever stay edged in our memory and make our hearts beat with wonder. Nobody will remember the ordinary. For myself, I'm a warrior who has fallen many times, who has gone through trails an tribulations and who is no stranger to adversity. After all, my choice remains clear, to get back up and stand stronger than ever. To recognize that it often takes our darkest moments to mold us into who we were meant to be. I have learned to trust the process and stay positive through the challenges. I trust it to be the only way to prevent my heart from hardening and allowing bitterness to creep in. I believe in the power of "NOW" as it is the only moment we truly ever have. The past is gone, unchangeable and the future hasn't happened yet. All we can impact is the current moment. Everything starts with a choice and hopefully with one that has something wild about it and may even scare you to death to execute. DO IT...I promise you won't regret it. This blog is my voice to share my Journey. If I could describe this adventure in short, I would call it "Spiritual awakening" with a yearning for "Freedom" and going after the things that truly matter. To seek a less complicated life that is stripped down from the many obligations and responsibilities that often tie us down. For me it is a life free of rules and regulations, one that allows me to escape the must expectations while jumping off the hamster wheel that is spinning faster all the time. To be on my own time and live each day to the fullest, to make it all slow down by banishing routine and unleashing my creativity/artistic values in an effort to entertain whatever subject comes to mind. And if lucky, to perhaps offer a different view to my readers, one that speaks to your soul vs. the demands of what society might expect. It is one that empowers you to be your unique self and follow the beat of your own drum. I am dreaming big as I trail blaze the path to a new life and becoming a storyteller. I find my inspiration in the little things in life, in Mother Nature and on the trail that provides the adventures and the backdrop for a book someday. My hope is to inspire "Courage" in others who might find themselves on the brink of taking that first step. This blog serves as a foundation for my collection of personal thoughts, opinions and experiences and by no means am I an expert on any topics mentioned. To my readers I would say that the universe connects us by a common thread, we all search and we all have something to say. We don't always have to meet in person to share a strong bond and people enter our path for a reason. Some stay for a short time and serve their purpose, while others teach us a lesson and help us become stronger through experience. And a few special ones remain as the treasures we hold dear over a lifetime and touch our hearts beyond means. In whatever way we are meant to be, I thank you for crossing my path and for stopping by. I hope that I have left you inspired, full of wonder and with a few "Wild Choices" to make....Hugs XO

3 thoughts on “Negativity – The emotional vampire

  1. I can relate! I value friendships that bring out the best in one another, so my friends tend to be spiritual and creative. The circle of friends is very small though. I will be sharing your post with my sister via email.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Awe that is so sweet and what a great compliment. Thank you so very much, it means more than I can express. Being new to blogging, feedback is everything and I am beyond happy that you found something between my lines worth sharing.
      Thank you ❤️

      Liked by 1 person

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